The Lord of the Rings
by LordHelen
Summary: Brianna, Sarah and Natalie somehow wake up in Rivendell, and decide to join the Fellowship. How can these girls change the the Lord of the Rings? Are they going to survive the deadly war, or is death upon them?
1. Chapter 1

The Fellowship

By

LordHelen

I wake up and stiffen. There is something cool beneath me. It might be marble, or glass, or even the smoothest of stone. This is odd because I had fallen asleep in my crude stone basement with an old and ripped pillow and a thin blanket.

I sit up and look around. The room is white marble, I deem. The marble swirls like ice cream up into pillars holding a smooth and bare roof up. The floor breaks off ahead of me into three steps that end in a courtyard. To my right and left are identical hallways that immediately curved inwards. Behind me is a wall.

Natalie is propped up on a pillar and Sarah is spread out across the middle of the floor. They are also waking up. My two best friends.

Sarah has a long curtain of gold hair that falls to her hips in curls. She has sporty blue eyes in a beautiful face. She has high cheekbones and a soft, slightly rounded chin. Her forehead is not short or particularly long and her nose is simple and straight. She has a definite hourglass figure and is incredibly tall for her age of sixteen, pushing 6'3" at last count. She is naturally a cheerleader, so she generally wears tight t-shirts and very short shorts. When she becomes head cheerleader at games and practice times she would wear an even shorter skirt and a shirt without sleeves in the black and gold of our school.

Natalie has a light brown tint to her skin, proof of her family's long history, dating back to her grandmother in some Native American tribe. I can never pronounce the name, and I certainly can't spell it. She also has a long curtain of hair, but in a deep black. Her eyes are chocolate brown set in a heart shaped face. Her chin has a soft point and her nose is petite and very slightly hooked. Only someone who knows her as well as I do could see it. She is definitely not a cheerleader, not even close. To be a cheerleader calls for some sort of athletic ability. She has none, except she loves running track. She keeps setting and then breaking the school record. She is incredibly short, 5'2". She generally wears faded jeans and loose long sleeved shirts. On the track she trades those for a white t-shirt and light shorts.

I myself am nothing exceptional. I have brutally murdered my hair, cutting it so it barely reaches my ear and dying a dark, (but not navy), blue streak through the center. I am creamy white, rather than tan like Sarah, and almost have an hourglass figure. I am just far enough away to slip from hot to cute. I am average height for a sixteen year old, 5'4". I have no freckles, but my nose was too small and my amber eyes were always narrowed. I usually wear long, ugly green coats to cover what I wear underneath and especially to cover my hand.

Sarah is now wearing an emerald green dress with darker green vine embroidering on the sleeves, hem, and bodice, with lighter green leaves sprouting at intervals. Her dress pulls up a little to reveal emerald slippers glittering as light bounces off tiny emeralds sewn to the shoes.

Natalie wears a pure white shirt covered with an equally white tunic, both of which are big enough to easily hide the fact she was a teenage girl. She wears what looks like brown leather pants with a matching belt. She has no shoes.

I myself wear a similar outfit. My shirt reveals no sign that I am a girl. My belt holds a plain black sheath with a plain black sword handle sticking out, three gold dagger sheaths with gold dagger hilts sticking out. Only one dagger is accented with amethysts while the other two are similar, with sapphires and then rubies. I also wear thick, black boots.

"Where are we?" Sarah whispers, looking around. She is still lying down, her gold hair spread out across the floor. "Wait! I know where we are! It looks like that big castle from the movie…um…"

"Rivendell, Sarah." Natalie offers, standing up. She touches the marble pillar, a look of fascination on her face. "And it feels kinda…real."

"Rivendell! That's it!" Sarah sits up and plays with the hem of her dress. But neither of them is asking the right question.

"But why are we here?" I ask loudly. Natalie looks up, and then frowns. Her forehead creases. Her thinking face.

"I don't know." Sarah shrugs, unconcerned.

"How are we here?" I voice the other important question. Sarah shrugs again and glares at her dress.

"The important thing is why are we dressed like this? I absolutely _loathe _long skirts."

"That's important? We have just entered a book and you are concerned about your _clothes?"_ I ask softly. _"Why?"_

"I just like being dressed my way." Sarah sniffs. Her eyes light up suddenly. "You may be right, though. If this is the room I think it is, than the Council is out there. We are so close to little Sam!"

"Oh, and Pippin!" Natalie adds, smiling wide. They both have dreamy fan girl looks plastered on their faces.

"No! We are not going to do one thing!" I hiss.

"What? Why?" Sarah says angrily.

"We are in a book, girls! There is a certain way things must go, and our very presence could upset the balance! If we let on we know about them and what's to come, we could end up killing everyone!"

"You're not even a little curious about Legolas?" Sarah says deviously, smiling at the blush that creeps up my neck into my cheeks. She has named my crush of the whole series.

"No, n-not at all." I answer. Her smile widens. "So what if I am? At least I know I can't do anything about it! Sarah, Natalie, we won't even be able to see them for that long."

"Why not?" Sarah asks immediately.

"You don't mean you intend to go on the quest?" I gasp, staring at her in horror. I know my tall friend is rather adventurous, but this is plain idiocy.

"Of course I do. I've always dreamed of meeting Sam!" Sarah smiles.

"But we would all die if we went on the quest!" I say.

"Says who?" Sarah glares down at me. She is usually very happy, but my negativity seems to have an alarming effect on her.

"Says me! Don't you realize it? Not one of us can use a weapon, we could hardly eat wild berries and sleep on rocks for any length of time, and we all _hate_ Boromir!" I answer. The last one is to try and remind her why she doesn't want to go.

"So? We can learn and endure." Sarah says.

"Yes, we could. I don't hate Boromir…that much." Natalie says, taking a moment to decide if she did or didn't.

"Oh, and which one of you is going to throw the Ring into Mt. Doom?" I demand. I wince at their hurt expressions, but I simply can_not_ let them get hurt. I love them far too much for that.

"Doesn't the Fellowship split at…at…" Sarah frowns, trying to remember the name.

"Amon Hen, Sarah." Natalie supplies again.

"Yes, Amon Hen!" Sarah says triumphantly. "Who says we have to go anywhere near Mordor?"

"Oh, yeah, I'd much rather get kidnapped by orcs or run across miles of Rohan to end up in two big battles and talking to dead men!" I answer.

"Brianna, I'm going whether…or…not…" Sarah slows her speech and drops to the ground. She grabs her head, fingers splayed on each side.

"Sarah!" I drop and drag her up. She is dead weight. "Sarah!"

"Incredible…" Sarah breathes. "Absolutely…incredible."

"Sarah, what are you talking about?" Natalie asks, grabbing her other arm. Sarah seems able to stand on her own, but I won't let go until I am sure she won't do that again. It appears Natalie agrees.

"Frodo is going to take the Ring!" Sarah says breathlessly, trying to walk forward. We hold her tight.

"We knew that already, Sarah." I say patiently. I reach up and try to feel for head bumps, but she shakes me off.

"I know, but I _saw_ it. I could feel them all. Frodo was so confused and scared. Boromir was…well, too proud to be scared. Sam and Pippin didn't know what was happening very well. It was…so amazing."

"Pippin? You saw Pippin?" Natalie asks excitedly.

"Guys, are either of you planning on asking how Sarah had a vision?" I ask.

"Oh, simple, really. When we came into this dimension, the change turned our forms. Sarah was changed into an elf, it appears, and it looks like I was changed into a hobbit. That's why I have no shoes. Bri, it looks like you were changed the least. You're a human." Natalie explains. I suspect she had come up with this while Sarah and I fought.

"Okay, if you're right…Sarah will have wicked aim and I'll be easily corrupted." I grimace at the thought of corruption. Fear begins to rise, so I press my scarred hand against my leg. The pain controls the fear. "Natalie, you'll eat a lot."

"Thanks." Natalie says dryly, giving me her best fake glare. It is pretty convincing until she ruins it by winking.

"Bri, I just remembered what I was saying." Sarah says. "I'm going whether or not you say I can. Don't you want to come with me? Make sure I don't go to Mordor?"

"You wouldn't dare." I growl, glaring at her. She knows how much her safety means to me. She smiles and shrugs. "Fine, I'll go. Happy?"

"YES!" Natalie and Sarah shout. I pull my sword out slowly so as not to fumble it and sneak behind Natalie. I shear her hair off until it is rather short.

"BRIANNA!" Natalie yells, grabbing at her shortened hair. She looks like a boy now.

"I had to, Natalie! Remember, this is the time where most girls stay at home at times of war. I would do the same for Sarah-"angry sniff-"but she's in a dress."

"FINE!" Natalie yells.

"Shh!" I order, staring at the entrance to the courtyard. "Come on." I whisper, leading them out to stand behind a pillar outside in the courtyard. The fighting has begun. Everyone is standing and yelling at each other. My eyes stray from the people to the pedestal that holds the Ring. A voice seems to whisper in my head something I can't understand. It is a foreign language, but it is all I can hear.

"Bri, are we going?!" Sarah shakes me hard and I blink. It is quiet and the Fellowship is lined up. Everyone is present. Have I been staring at the Ring that long? I nod and Sarah, without waiting for Natalie or me, steps out and walks toward Elrond.

"I will go!"

"Why would you like to go, fair lady?" Elrond says, composing his face. He must be mad his secret council was not secret.

"I can see the future. Can you tell me this would not be useful on such a quest?" I almost laugh at the way she puts her hands on her hips and gave the lord stare-for-stare.

"Well, of course it would be useful." Elrond says, staring back calmly.

"Me too! Me too! I want to go too!" Natalie calls, running forward. She trips over her own feet, catches herself, and walks up. I shake my head.

"Very well. What are your names?" Elrond says.

"She is Sarah and he is Nate." I say, walking forward. "My name is…uh…" I panic and make something up quickly. "Brine."

"I assume that you will want to go as well, uh, Brine." Elrond grimaces at my poor name.

"Yes." I say quietly.

"Then I now deem you twelve the Fellowship of the Ring." Elrond announces. Then it hits me and I feel winded. _I just joined the Fellowship. I just sentenced myself. I'm going to die before I'm seventeen._

**I would like to add a disclaimer. I do not own anything so far except the girls, it all belongs to J.R.R. Tolkien. I own nothing at all.**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two: Start

By

LordHelen

I wait, but nothing happens. After the impact of what I'd done hit, I expected fire to rain from the sky or perhaps a swarm of people eating bugs. Nothing happens, though. Elrond stands there and I get the impression it was anticlimactic for the others as well. Elrond says something about us setting off tomorrow, but I didn't really hear.

I look around and see everyone was staring at us. Of course, we were the ones who decided the fate of their world. But must they stare so? Must they look as if I'm a goddess, or some special hero? They must know there is a good chance we will fail. But then again I understand the need to focus on the positive. I of all people should understand that.

"Well, are we allowed to eat now?" Pippin asks, winning a laugh from everyone. Everyone but me. I'm not very hungry, to say the least. To say the most would be I wanted to run away and starve myself to death so I couldn't be massacred by evil orcs. But that was clearly not an option.

People began to leave the courtyard, leaving in groups of twos and threes. Sarah and Natalie left shortly after the hobbits did, staring after them with maniacal gleams in their eyes. Boromir left on his own, talking loudly about food. Gandalf left with Elrond, and Legolas disappeared with another elf. Gimli went with another dwarf I assumed to be his father, and Aragorn went off in what I presumed to be a search for Arwen.

Finally, I am alone. I sit on the ground heavily, leaning my head back on a chair behind me. Yesterday I was just a pathetic nobody. Now I am traveling with the world's last hope of survival. I'm not used to being…noticed. It seemed normal that everyone had left me here alone. The scariest thing so far has been the way people stared at me.

I laugh humorlessly. Imagine that. I know there's a giant fire demon and several battles down the road, but I'm terrified of a little attention. I look down at my hand and trace the ugly red scar with a finger. How would I cover it now?

"Uh, Mr. Brine?" Sam's voice is too close. My head snaps up and I see he is just a few feet away.

"What, Sam?" I ask slowly. I am not in the mood to deal with Sarah's little gardener, especially not when I am all alone.

"Were you going to come and eat? The elves have made a real great feast." Sam steps back once, staring at me oddly.

"No." I say harshly. I glare at him until he leaves and then I close my eyes and lean back. I am so tired. I had never been this tired, not once in my life. I had often been so tired I felt like I would die if I didn't sleep, but this is far worse. I am asleep as soon as my eyes shut.

"Bri!" Sarah shakes me and I groan. I am not ready to wake up yet. My body feels stiff and sore, and my head is clouded with sleep.

"Leave me alone." I complain. Sarah shakes me again and I bury my head in a soft pillow. I jump up, looking around. I am in a small room with Sarah and Natalie. "When did I get in bed?"

"Oh, Legolas carried you here." Sarah smiles deviously at that. "You fell asleep in the courtyard. Legolas went back there for fresh air and found you. It's morning now."

"I'm going back to sleep." I say, lying down. Sarah grabs my arm and pulls me up.

"Bri, come on! We have to get going soon!"

"Fine, I'm up!" I answer, stretching. I am still in my brown leather pants and white shirt and tunic. My belt hangs on a plain chair at the other side of the room. I grab it and put it on, tightening it so it squeezes my waist.

"Elrond is getting some water and food ready. I think by food he means lembas, but I guess it doesn't matter." Natalie says, standing up. Hooked to her belt was a brand new dagger, looking like a sword on her tiny form.

"Where did you get that?" I demand.

"This? The elves gave it to me. They said I was going to need it where I was going." Natalie says, shocked by the tone of my voice.

"You're not going to fight, are you? What if you get hurt, or…or…" I can't find the right words, but she can see I'm panicking. I'm starting hyperventilate.

"Bri, calm. I'm not going to fight if I can help it. But wouldn't you want me to be prepared if I had to?" Natalie says in a patient tone. I nod, but it takes another minute of both of them soothing me until I'm calmed down. It's just…the thought of Natalie fighting is terrifying. She is tiny enough to be mistaken for a hobbit, and she has no skill at combat. It's just as scary as imagining beautiful Sarah fighting.

"Okay, you calmed me. Let's go now." I say. Sarah leads me out to the gate of Rivendell, where the Fellowship is gathering. I finally get a chance to look closely at everyone.

Frodo seems even shorter than I thought, with dark brown locks that curl tightly around his head. He has light blue eyes and a soft, white face. He looks distant right now, as if he's not really there. Sam is blond with blue eyes, but he looks excited, holding on to Bill's reins. Pippin has light brown hair and light brown eyes. He looks sort of…confused. Merry has the lightest brown hair of all with startling blue eyes. He must understand what's going on because he looks terrified.

Legolas is perfect. His blond hair has a dark, mellow tint to it. His blue eyes are dim as well. He is wearing green and brown, a color that shines because they are clean. Not for long, though. He also has very good boots. His bow and arrows are ready to be used.

Gimli has a shining helm and dwarf armor. His axe is very big. It gleams as the early sun bounces off of it. His hair and beard grow down long enough to tuck in his belt. Gimli is just as short as the hobbits, but his face is wrinkled with age and his blue eyes glow.

Aragorn looks splendid in black and smoky grey. His dark hair is flecked with grey and his eyes are a beautiful smoky grey blue. He has his sword strapped to his waist and his shield to his back. He looks humble, though. As if a simple traveler, not the prince he is. He doesn't even look close to any kind of royalty.

Gandalf has big bushy eyebrows that stick out beneath his faded blue hat and a long beard that matches his eyebrows. He wears a dark grey cloak and also has boots. He has a long, wooden staff with a small crystal set in the top.

Boromir wears the colors of Gondor, a sword, and a shield. He stands tall and proud, ready to prove his kingdom. He is really isn't so bad, just a complete imbecile…

"You twelve have volunteered to throw the Ring of Power into the Cracks of Fire, of your own free will. If any of you now wish to abandon this quest, now is the time." Elrond says formally. No one speaks up. "Very well. Then leave now with our hope and prayers."

So the gates open and we step out of the last safe house, and we walk out into the unknown. I can't believe it. I'm ready to go on this journey, because who else could protect my Sarah and Natalie? Who else could I trust?


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three: Scar

By

LordHelen

**This chapter is to reveal Brianna's past and how she got her scar. It is dark, so don't read unless you are ready. Also contains some language.**

I am miserable. My tongue is paper dry, and we don't have enough water to drink all day. My stomach is begging for food because when I finally convince Gandalf to feed me, he only lets me nibble some lembas. Though invigorating, it does little to fill me. Sarah isn't having half as hard a time as I am.

Sarah seems happy to walk alongside Sam, talking about gardening. I have a feeling Sarah's new hobby with bushes is just because of Sam. Natalie also seems to be happy, talking with Pippin about different food. Of course, she's always loved eating good food. She used to tell me all about filet mignon, but I don't really remember anything.

I alone am walking at the back. Don't they realize the risk? What if Natalie said something about pizza, and then told Sam about our world? What could happen? Or if Sarah forgot and talked about how much she loves the mall? The best thing to do would be to walk at the back and ignore everyone. Or at least don't talk at length to them.

I look over our company. Just now am I seeing how completely pathetic our fellowship is. We have four small hobbits that have no skill with any weapon and require regular feeding. One dwarf who has an axe bigger than himself and is too short to run even as fast as Sarah. An elf that also has no weapon knowledge, cannot run even at her top speed because of hindering skirts, and could at any time collapse while having a vision. Another hobbit that can run, but again has no skill at violence. Another elf that is good with a bow and can run rather fast, but is far too cheery to seem dangerous. A wizard that has not nearly as much magic as we need at this time and is not telling all he knows. Two men who do have skill with a blade and battle, but one is starting to get corrupted and the other is uncertain if he can stay true. Finally, we have a short teenage girl, who has never touched a sword before, is scarred in several ways, and thinks she is starting to get corrupted.

Because I believe that. I keep looking back at Frodo, trying to see through him to the Ring. I keep hearing an odd voice, a whispering in a weird language. I feel as if I could understand what it was telling me if I just touched the Ring, and it feels vital that I understand what it tells me. I can fight, though. I have enough sense to know that the Ring is no good and touching it won't help me at all.

Still, can I keep that frame of mind? Boromir is actually a pleasant man, talking kindly to the hobbits and even catching Natalie a few times when she trips. The Ring twisted Boromir into a maniac. What can it to do my weakened mind?

"Sarah?" Natalie says in a sharp voice. My head snaps up and I see Sarah on her knees, clutching her head. I sit next to her and carefully pull her up. She leans on me gratefully and moans.

"Sarah, what is it? What do you see?" I say, trying to keep my voice even. Trying to act like I wasn't terrified by this. Trying to pretend that I was used to this, that it was no big deal.

"Sauron." Sarah whispers in my ear, still leaning on me. I stare at her in shock.

"What do you mean?" I hiss back, aware that everyone is staring at us; Legolas alone looks like he can hear us. Curse his elvish ears.

"Sauron knows. He knows about the Fellowship. He's sending spies, and he wants all of us captured." Sarah whispers. She looks like she's trying to get another vision. "The Nine will fly soon."

"What did she see, Brine?" Natalie ventures finally. I look up, coming back to the present out of my well of horror.

"Sarah has seen…well, the Enemy…" I am not used to be to being the center of attention and Sarah can't say anything because she's still trying to see more. "The Enemy is sending spies and the Nine will fly. Sarah thinks he knows about us and he is trying to find us all."

"This is indeed grave news." Gandalf says, looking around. "Let us flee this place! We must fly far, or risk being seen! The skies have eyes!"

I don't have enough time to question his odd words, because suddenly we are running instead of walking and Sarah gives up her task of trying to see and I am still thirsty. I still wish I could have water, but now I am terrified. How did He find out? How are we to get the Ring past him now? How are we going to survive?

I find my eyes wandering to the Ring again and I sigh. Even through the terror, I can't stop thinking about this. I can't direct my thoughts from that Ring for very long. We are running fast, and then we walk because we need to rest. Then we run some more, and the stop to eat. I can't help but feel that this is not real. Like I am watching someone who looks like me, but I don't feel anything.

So that night, when I'm bundled up and supposed to be sleeping, it hits. Sauron wants all of us, and he won't stop until he has each and every one of us. That means no matter what I do the odds are that Sarah, Natalie and I will be killed. I can't protect us. I'm ashamed as well, because I'm not actually thinking about the other two that much. I just keep thinking that I'm going to die. I don't want to die so soon, but now it seems inevitable.

I shiver despite the bedroll wrapped around me and stare up at the night sky. I'm falling asleep, I can tell by my drooping eyelids.

"_Where am I?" I ask, standing up. The dark around me is slightly foggy, like everything is smoky. I look down and see my light pink dress is smoky too. I've never seen this dress before._

_Then something cuts into my shoulder and I gasp, falling to my knees. The scene changes and clears. I'm in my basement and I'm wearing a long green coat. My 'father' has a knife, and my shoulder is bleeding freely._

"_Shut up! I've had enough of your sniveling, you worthless bitch."_

"_Yes." I answer, too afraid to say anything else. He grabs my hand and holds it up, inspecting the features._

"_I've had enough of your sniveling. So stop. Let's see…start yelling."_

"_NO!" I scream, realizing what he's going to do. But it's too late. The knife is shoved through my hand, cracking two knuckles by the sound. I give a wordless scream as pain fills my arm, blood washing the ground._

I sit upright, blinking rapidly. It had felt so real! Like I was really there with him, back to my personal hell.

"Brine, calm down! It's just me." Natalie says softly. I look at her stupidly before I realize she had wakened me.

"Oh, no. I was having a nightmare." I explain.

"It was obvious, Brine." Sarah calls from several feet away. "You kept rolling and moaning like you were in pain. Nate thought you were dying."

"I did not, I just said that like a joke!" Natalie says defensively. I smile and accept lembas and some more water. It is odd how that dream has opened my eyes. I'm actually happy here. My old life was hell, a hell I could never escape. Every day I got a new bruise, a new cut. Every night I stayed awake until I couldn't keep my eyes open any longer in fear. Here I have freedom. Even if I'm a target, on a dangerous mission, I have friends and I don't have to fear _him_ anymore.

"When do we go?" I ask.

"Brine, stop it! Let me eat first!" Natalie complains. I laugh and smile. This is easy. This is natural.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four: Sarah and Natalie

By

LordHelen

"How far are we going now?" Sarah complains loudly. I think there is actually a group-wide groan. This is the fifth times she's asked, and she keeps doing it every five minutes.

"It is at least a league or more." Gandalf answers with a sigh. I roll my eyes at Sarah's behavior. Like a little a kid during a long car ride. Of course Gandalf is talking about the mountain. We're heading to the big mountain, the plan to go over it still in place.

"How far is a league?" Natalie asks interestedly. I try to think of an answer, but I realize no one says league in our time anymore. In fact, I've heard of league, but I've never found out what it means.

"An hour's walk." Boromir answers this time. He has been helpful like this recently, answering Natalie's frequent questions and playing with the hobbits. It's like he's trying to be a good guy, even though I know he's a bad guy. Well, maybe not a bad guy…I'm starting to understand him more. I think I have an idea what it must have been like for him in the movies, what it must be like now. The Ring keeps finding a way into my thoughts as well. I'm different though, I have no pride and no kingdom to fight for. He has a whole kingdom on his back, trying to make a right decision. It must be incredibly difficult to do so with the Ring possessing his thoughts like it is.

"That doesn't seem like a very good way to measure distance." Sarah says. What is she thinking? It works, doesn't it? Just because you can't break it down into exact miles doesn't mean it's flawed. "How many miles?"

"About three, Sarah." Merry says kindly. I can tell some of them are mad at her now, or at least they don't like her. I can't blame them, really. Sarah seems shallow and a little narcissistic if you don't know her, but if you get close then you can see how special she is. Natalie has no such problems. She is easy going and fun to everyone, even strangers. An easy person to like.

I think I'm giving off a worse vibe than even Sarah. I don't talk to anyone, I usually walk at the back all alone, and I hardly ever stop glaring. The glaring part is not really intentional; I'm just trying to look out for Sarah and Natalie. The other two are on purpose though. I don't want any friends. I can't get attached to these people. Besides, even if I wanted a friend I had no idea how to make one. It's not as if I can do what I did to get Sarah.

_I was at the library, a rare opportunity to spend the afternoon away from my hell. I was reading up on the First World War for my history class. I had a whole report due, five whole pages! I had this really big book all about the war, but because my 'dad' wouldn't let me get a library card I had to read there. I probably wouldn't have checked it out anyway. I would have stayed until the library closed at five._

_I was taking notes off the big book when I heard whispering from behind the bookcase. Then a phone did a little _da-ding _very loudly, like a text message. The librarian, Miss Martin, came over and said, "Put that away! This is a library!"_

"_But…" Sarah had started to argue. I recognized her voice. Sarah was head cheerleader, how could I not? That voice screamed the cheers at every football game. That voice failed to give answers in the two classes I had with her, Math and History. That voice belonged to the girl every girl in school wanted to be. Most popular, most beautiful, head cheerleader…Everyone knew that voice._

"_No buts! If you cannot turn it off, then I will take it from you!" Martin threatened. Sarah groaned, but the librarian left soon after. Then Sarah came around to my table and laid out a bunch of paper_

"_I'll never get it right." Sarah hissed quietly, not even noticing my existence. I looked over and saw she was doing Math._

"_I could help you with that." I offered hesitantly. I was still a freshman, but my teacher did compliment my Math skills. I had very little worth concentrating on, so I might as well do Math._

"_What do you mean?" Sarah asked suspiciously, looking me over. I thought it was because she was popular and I wasn't._

"_Well, I'm Brianna Evans. The one Mr. Barner compliments." I admitted. Sarah stared at me for a while, trying to place my name._

"_Brianna Evans? The one who's good at Math? Oh, would you help me?" Sarah pouted prettily, like she did at the teachers to get them to give her another chance on homework._

"_I guess. See, you messed up here. Do you know what E=mc squared means?" I asked, looking over her work. Sarah shook her head. "Then you need me."_

"_Oh, thank you! Can I help you with something? Is that history? I love history!" Sarah gushed euphorically._

"_You do?" I asked, staring at the book in shock. Sarah had never seemed the book type to me-or to the rest of the school._

"_Of course I do! I have a reputation to keep, though, so I can't be too smart in school. I do love it though. I love reading about knights and kings, and castles and wars. It fascinates me, to read how we once were. In fact…my three favorite books are the Lord of the Rings! I know they're not real, but they amaze me!"_

"_Really? Mine too! I don't read that much, but I love those." I answered. Sarah gushed on about how it was destiny we'd met and how she just had to take me out for coffee later. At that point I interrupted and reminded her about the Math. I refused the coffee because staying out later than five thirty was suicide. But the next day in school Sarah hunted me down and forced me to eat lunch with her. It took maybe two months, but I loved Sarah. She turned into my lifeline._

"I'm tired of walking!" Sarah complains again, only this time to just me. We have stopped briefly for lunch. She pushes some of her golden hair behind her left ear and stares disdainfully at the lembas bread. "I wish this world had invented donuts!"

"Shh, Sarah!" I remind her hurriedly. She looks around carefully, blushing. Then she looks at me with that same pretty pout I was just thinking about.

"Sorry. I forgot…"

"It's okay; you just said it to me. But we can't let them know, Sarah." I say softly. She smiles brightly at me and walks over to Sam. Sam seem to be the one person who likes Sarah, other than Natalie and I. Sarah already had a crush on Sam. She had dissected his character thoroughly in the books, trying to discover everything about him. So she warmed up to him immediately, and he can see what a truly beautiful person she really is, even if she is shallow at times.

Natalie has taken to talking to everyone, not just Pippin. She has coaxed Legolas to teach her a sentence of elvish,(Help! I have fallen and cannot get up!), has gotten Aragorn to tell her the exact definition of a ranger, has made Boromir tell her why Minas Tirith is the 'White City' and his thoughts on racism, pressured Gandalf into explaining the different colors of wizards and the ranks and why he wasn't a white yet, and finally, managed to get Gimli to tell her about dwarf mining.

I have yet to speak with Legolas. I want to, I do. I just don't know what I would say, and how I would manage to not blush, stutter, and otherwise be a complete fan girl. There is the off chance I'll go nuts and scream his name and hug him, but my personality says that's very unlikely. It's not like I can do what I did to get Natalie.

_I was at school alone because Sarah was home sick. I planned to go straight home and go to my room to do homework before my 'father' woke up. If he woke up and I wasn't there…I couldn't even think about it._

_I was sore because he had gone all out last night. The back of my head throbbed from being slammed into a stone wall. If I to took off my coat and rolled up my long sleeves than I would reveal bruises from where he grabbed me so tight. If I pulled up my baggy pants I would reveal a new scar, a long, jagged line from my knee to the end of my calf._

"_Hey, leave me alone!" Natalie had screamed. I looked up and saw the best runner, the midget of the school. Three boys surrounded her. One had pushed her books down out of her hands, another grabbed her hips and jerked her back. I was okay with letting myself get terrorized, it was my fate. But how could I stand by and let someone else be bullied when I myself was still going through it?_

_So I went over and swung. Since I had watched as my 'father' did it often, I knew where to hit. I went for the one still holding her hips, hitting him on his nose so perfectly I heard a crack. He pulled back and whimpered, holding his nose. Natalie, getting the idea, kicked the one in front of her in the nuts. He dropped with a piercing cry. Then a teacher came to punish us, but with a whole yard for of kids testifying self-defense, we got off free. _

"_Thank you, Brianna." Natalie said. I jumped. I thought I had been walking home alone._

"_For what?"_

"_That was…brave. I didn't think anyone at this school would care enough to step in and swing like that! It was awesome!"_

"_Oh, that was…"_

"_Don't say nothing, Brianna." Natalie said seriously, staring at me broodingly. "You were brave. I know you hang out with the blond cheerleader a little, but…is there room at your table for one more?"_

"_Wait, you want to hang out?" I asked stupidly. I had never been so popular. I had never really had friends_. "With me?"

"_Of course. You see, a bunch of boys pick on me because I'm not really that girlish. Girls don't really like me because I don't act…'civilized.' But you were…so nice, and I'd like a friend like you. A friend who can swing like that would be awesome!"_

"_Okay, I guess. Natalie, right? School champion?"_

"_Oh, don't remind me! I have to practice again tomorrow!"_

"_Okay, we'll talk about something else. Ever read the Lord of the Rings?"_

"Sarah?" Sam asks worriedly. I turn and see Sarah on the ground, grabbing her head so tight her nails dig into the flesh. I stand next to her and wait in what I hope looks like a knowing calm. Can't let them see I'm freaking out on the inside.

"Brine…" Sarah hisses softly. I kneel beside her, taking her face in my hands. Her eyes are two giant orbs, shiny and fearful.

"What is it, Sarah?" I whisper, catching the vibe that she has something bad to say. Or something private.

"He has sent them. They're here." Sarah says, but her words are unnecessary, because suddenly there's a screech. A high pitched scream, that is not far away like when the hobbits heard it before. No, this Nazgul is almost upon us, and I clutch my ears. They feel like they're going to die under this strain, under this horrible scream. I can hear something though. In the back of my mind, the whisper of the Ring has grown to a shout that brings tears to my eyes. The Ring is calling for its true master in a voice that hurts. The Ring is fighting with us all. Then I think about taking the Ring for the very first time ever.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five: Moria

By

LordHelen

I am horrified. I can't believe such a preposterous, evil thought had entered my mind! How could I even think about taking the Ring? How could I when I know what it would do to Frodo, what it would do to me? I shake myself back to the present danger. Nazgul are very near, and we are still about a mile away from the huge mountain.

"Nate!" I call loudly. I'm not the only one shouting. Gandalf are trying to organize the hobbits and get them to run. Natalie appears in front of me magically. "Take Sarah! You need to run with her to the mountain, understand? Just make sure she gets there!"

"What about Pippin?" Natalie says softly, staring at him longingly. I sigh and roll my eyes.

"I'll take him to the mountain, I swear. Please, Nate. Take care of Sarah." I beg. Natalie looks up into my eyes and something she sees there decides her. She nods and takes Sarah's hand.

"Come on Sarah, I'll teach you how to run like me."

"Come here." I grab Pippin and tug him gently over to me. He stumbles, catches himself, and glares at me. I'm ready to force him onward because the whole group is starting to move forward and he's not moving.

"Merry!" he protests as soon as I begin to shove. I sigh and reach forward, grabbing the other hobbit's shirt and pulling him back. Merry starts to protest, but we don't have time and I honestly don't care. I push both hobbits forward.

"Come on!" I beg them. They run too slow, so I have to keep pushing them to keep them in front of me.

"Where to? The mountain must be a mile away!" Merry complains.

"Then I suggest you run faster." I answer. Suddenly, there is another shriek, but this one is closer. The Nazgul are still coming for us, and we all speed up. For the first time, I make it to the center of the group. I look ahead and see with relief that Sarah and Natalie are at the front, only behind Legolas, the incredibly fast elf.

The mountain is on the horizon, but the horizon looks so far away right now. I shake my head, and push Pippin again, who is beginning to fall behind.

Both hobbits look thoroughly miserable, and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't sorry for them. I feel bad, but we have to get to the mountain quickly! I put on more speed and we're almost right behind Natalie and Sarah. I'm glad to see Sarah doesn't seem tired at all yet. My lungs are on fire, and the two hobbits in front of me seem to be ready to drop dead.

Suddenly the mountain doesn't seem so far, like we're almost upon it. I look up and see something big and black soaring above us, blocking out the sky. It starts to lower itself onto us and someone screams. Probably Sarah, it sounds like Sarah. I run faster and the hobbits actually sound like they're starting to die. Then there is snow beneath our feet and I let them slow down a bit.

The monster turns away as soon as we are on the mountain and fades into the distance. We slow to a steady walk, the whole group worn out. Pippin and Merry are not well off, and the snow is rising as a storm kicks up. Soon it will be over their heads and they are shivering so much I can hear their teeth chattering.

I pick both of them up and swing them onto my back, Merry first and then Pippin. They wrap their arms around my neck and shiver on my back instead, but it is noticeably less. I think I can hear a voice over the wind, maybe someone commanding the storm. The snow came down harder than I've ever seen. Once, a blizzard hit so hard that our door froze over and I could feel it deep in the basement. 'Dad' had to break the ice off, and the rip the door down all together because it rotted. This was worse.

The gale force winds push me down, towards the now waist high snow. By waist high, I mean Legolas waist high. It is getting harder to move. The snow is burying me, and the hobbits on my back aren't doing any better. The whole Fellowship stops at the sound of cracking above us. We all look up and see an avalanche of snow beginning to descend from higher up on the mountain. I hear Sarah's high pitched cry before the white blanket hits me and I drop onto my stomach.

I can't breathe, I'm suffocating. I closed my eyes when the avalanche hit me, so all I see is black. It's just like when my 'father' would go into a darker stage when he was both high and drunk, and would choke me until I blacked out. He hadn't done it for almost a year when I got here, and it is very traumatizing to be reminded of this.

Now, I'm already freaked out about the suffocation. The feeling jumps to hysterical fear when a hand closes around my neck. I start to panic, but then I remember the hobbits and start to struggle to get up. They must be suffocating too. But with their weight and the suffocation, I can't even get to my knees. Suddenly, a hand grabs my wrist and I'm being pulled up, up, up out of the snow.

"Air!" I gasp when my head breaks the surface. I gulp in air and clutch my ribs, squashing the fear easily. I'm safe now, I'm not suffocating and it is impossible for that man to hurt me ever again. I'm safer now than I've been in my life. Then I pry the hand from my neck and fold it around my neck in a solid, but not choking, hold.

"T-t-t-thank you." I mumble out through chattering teeth. I look up and my eyes pop wide when I see who my rescuer is. A blond beauty is staring down at me, still holding my wrist. I look down at the snow and stand up slowly, careful not to bump the two on my back. As a result, I was very awkward.

"You're welcome." Legolas replies in his ringing voice. I look around as soon as he releases my wrist and grimace. The place…the mountain is covered way too high in snow. The storm is still threatening to blow us off the mountain, and there is already snow up to Legolas' chest, but he's on top of the snow. Everyone looks very cold and miserable. I'm searching for Natalie and Sarah.

"Nate, Sarah!" I gasp when I see them. Sarah isn't dressed for this kind of weather, none of us are, but her dress is less protection than our clothes. She is trembling like a leaf in the wind, and it looks very…sad. Natalie isn't much better off probably, but she puts up a strong suit. She doesn't shiver, but she refuses to talk as well. Probably because her teeth would chatter and reveal how cold she really is. "I hope you guys are okay."

"F-f-fine." Sarah manages. I show Natalie Pippin real quick. All she is capable of doing is checking his pulse and seeing if he's conscious before Boromir starts talking.

"We cannot continue by this way. Some of us cannot even stand!" he is looking at the two hobbits clinging desperately to my back at this. "I pledge you, let us go by the Gap of Rohan to Gondor!"

"That would take quite a long time, and perhaps one might pass without Saruman seeing him, but a large host most certainly will not!" Gandalf answers.

"Why does it take such thought? If we cannot go over mountain, let us go under it! Let us go by the Mines!" Gimli puts in.

"I would not go that way if it was the last chance, Gimli." Gandalf says quietly. I see Sarah open her mouth, but then she closes it as if she forgot what she wanted to say. Which is very unlike Sarah.

"Why not let the Ring Bearer decide?" I ask slowly, managing not to stutter. Everyone looks immediately at Frodo. I think I can guess what is going through his head. There is no real reason not to go through the Mines, Gimli seems to think they'll be great. Besides, being underground might be a bit more like home. Of course, this is a guess.

"We will go through the Mines." Frodo decides. So Aragorn and Boromir go to clear a way and then they come back and lead us down the mountain. We rest in an area that has not been completely covered by the drifts, and then climb back down the rest of the mountain. By the time we reach the bottom, my legs are numb and the hobbits seem to have gained weight. My back aches at the strain of supporting them and when I stop walking the world spins sickeningly and I stumble.

Someone grabs my shoulder and steadies me. I look behind me and see Legolas again. He smiles at me and walks on. The world is done spinning when I put the hobbits on the ground and stretch out my sore back. Then I look them over. Both are half frozen and a bit shaken, but they look fine and both hug me for carrying them. Then Natalie comes to fuss over Pippin.

"Sarah, you look awful." I comment, looking her over. Her dress is sopping wet from the snow and she is shaking worse than the hobbits. Her hair is plastered to her neck and forehead with sweat and she is hugging herself tightly as if she can warm herself with her own body heat.

"T-t-t-t-thanks." Sarah bites out, looking like she's about to bite her tongue off trying to talk. I walk over and rub her arms very fast, trying to warm her. She smiles at me and looks around, brightening when she sees Sam. That particular hobbit had to walk all on his own most of the way and now he's sitting down, looking about to nod off.

I let Sarah go after a few seconds so she can go inspect Sam while trying not to disturb him. Pippin looks happy and miserable at the same time. Probably happy that Natalie is warming him up and being nice to him, and miserable that she won't let him go even though he's warm. Merry is rubbing his own arms, neglected by Natalie, and the rest of the Fellowship is looking around, watching the hobbits closely. Gandalf goes around giving each of us a sip of some elvish drink and then he makes us start walking towards the Mines. I'm feeling sick again, but this time it's fear about Sarah and Natalie. Would they get badly hurt in the fiasco that awaits us at the Mines? It was a good possibility, and I wouldn't be able to protect them. I may have weapons, but I cannot use them.

I touch the hilt of my sword and wonder for the first time what I should name it. In all my books the knights name their swords. Thunder, I decide. Thunder is the best name I can come up with, and it reminds me of Alanna's sword, Lightning, in the First Adventure by Tamora Pierce. I pull my sword out of the hilt a bit and notice it is an excellent blade. It is thin and light, but it looks really sharp and hard. The metal of the blade has a silver sheen that glows in the light of the sun, which will be setting soon. Because it is light, I can easily hold it. Since I have no real training with swords, a heavier one would be hard to lift.

I slide it back in the hilt and look around. We're going by the big lake now, and the sun is almost set. When we finally reach the other side my feet ache from standing so long and I want to sit down. But I don't. I stand as tall as I can and look around, trying to look menacing. By Sarah's giggles, I have failed. I stop and just lean against the side of the mountain, biting my thumb and surveying the scene before me.

"The Mines are no place for a pony, Sam." Aragorn says softly, helping Sam remove the packs and tack from the horse.

"Bye, Bill." Sam says mournfully, waving as the pony hobbles off into the dark. He starts distributing the packs to their owners, and I realize I have a pack when he puts one in front of me.

I look in it and discover there a lot of white bandages and healing herbs. Other than the medicine supplies, there is about a pound of dried meat and some lembas and dried fruit. It doesn't feel very heavy, but after a while, it would gain weight. I put it on my back and continue to wait. The moon is high in the sky and Gandalf is trying to open the cursed door.

I sigh and put my elbow on my knee, cupping my face with my hand. I am watching the still, black water sleepily and then suddenly I'm jerking upright at the sound of stones hitting the water. I look around blearily and then blink and see the dark ripples spreading across the vast pool. Cold starts to spread through me when I notice, barely visible in the moonlight, bubbles appearing at the center of the pool. Only a few, maybe five.

"Do not disturb the water, Halfling." Aragorn said quietly to Pippin, grabbing the wrist of the arm that was prepared to throw another stone. I stand up and look around. Frodo is analyzing the riddle above the door, Sarah is obsessing over Samwise, who looks thoroughly miserable about poor old Bill, and Natalie is now leading Pippin away from the water with consoling words about how little trouble he's in.

"What is the elvish word for friend?" Frodo asks loudly, still staring at the silver lines above the door.

"Mellon." Gandalf answers in a carrying voice. The stone groans loudly and then separates into a gaping doorway. I grab Sarah and drag her towards the door, Natalie right in front of us.

"Sarah, you and Natalie stay inside. Do not come out and stick together." I tell her, pushing her inside. She nods and grabs Natalie's arm, clinging to her like a little girl clings to her mother in a strange place. I grip the hilt of my sword and take a deep breath and then I hear Frodo's girlish scream.

"Mr. Frodo!" Sam cries out. I spin around and run out. Water is raining from the sky and a giant, pink monster is gripping Frodo in one tentacle. Aragorn and Boromir are right behind me, and I don't look to see about the others. I draw my sword and hack wildly at a tentacle. Another one wraps around my waist and drags me under the water.

Black water closes over my head and when I hit the bottom the air is forced from my lungs in a stream of bubbles. Water rushes into my lungs, scraping my throat. I slice at the tentacle that's holding me and then finally it comes free and I scramble up into air, gasping for breath. Another tentacle warps around my leg and pulls me up into the air. I hack blindly, trying desperately to get down. I have a terrible fear of heights. I slice through another tentacle and fall on the ground on my stomach.

I scramble up and see everyone is running back towards the Mines. I jump up and follow as fast as I can. I just get inside when there is a rumbling from above. I lunge forward to land on my knees several feet away from the entrance when the rocks rain down, blocking the entrance and moonlight. Pitch black, all around me. It is the exact pitch of my basement when he went to bed and left me alone with the light off. The stone floor was as uneven as my basement, intensifying the feeling. I reach out blindly in the dark, my hand searching for something human to grasp, maybe one of my friends to tell myself that I'm not in my basement and I'm just fine. Instead something sharp slices my hand.

My hand was bleeding still, I could hear the drops hit the floor. It was too dark to really see anything, but I could hear. I could hear my shallow, ragged breathing, I could hear my frantic heart, and I thought I could even hear the blood seep out of my veins. I grabbed my wrist and tried to control my breathing, but it was so painful!

I leaned back against the wall with a gasp of pain and tried to think of a way to stifle the blood flow. Finally, seeing no other way, I grabbed my blanket from the floor and pressed it against my hand. It was becoming soaked at an alarming rate. I put some pressure over the wound and screamed at the pain. But how could I take the pressure off? I needed that blood to stop, so I just sat there screaming.

A light shines through the darkness, blindingly bright. I claw my way up from my memory that is so much more real by the pain in my hand and struggle towards the light. I open my eyes and see the rocky ceiling above me and Sarah leaning over me looking concerned. I blush, realizing suddenly that I screamed out loud.

"Uh, Bri-Brine?" Sarah stumbles over my fake name in her concern. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, of course." I say looking around. There is skeletons piled in every direction, with bloodied weapons and armor. I see one sword with fresh blood and realize I must have cut myself on it. I look at my hand to see I am now going to have another scar to go with my first. They'll make an X. "Where are we? Is there a curse for disturbing the dead?"

Everyone looks around, the attention shifting away from me. Gimli gives a howl of pain and everyone is visibly grimmer. Everyone is looking over the bones and blood. Everyone except me and Boromir, I notice. Boromir is looking at Frodo, or more specifically, the Ring. I am too, actually. Now that I'm back to earth after being traumatized and everything is settling down, I find that same hunger that kept me up last night gnawing at me. It demands the Ring, and the Ring itself whispers in the back of my mind in that same strange language, soft and seductive.

"It has been so long…ah, yes! This way!" Gandalf started off and I jolted out of my trance, following his brisk pace. Sarah and Natalie find me at the back of the crowd and fall in next to me.

"Are you really okay, Bri?" Sarah whispers worriedly, staring at my eyes as if she can find the answer in them. I put a wall up around me so she won't see one thing in those eyes. My past is something no one can know, especially naïve little Sarah. She sees the wall in my eyes and something in her own eyes changes. She seems almost…cold.

"Of course I am. It was nothing. I cut my hand and it hurt. It's not a big deal." I shake my head and smile, but neither of them look convinced.

"My brother Gale cut his hand with a poker. Stabbed right through, needed twenty five stitches. He never screamed like that once, and you know him, he's a big baby." Natalie argues softly.

"I'm telling you it was no big deal! Just a cut…" I answer. It's the truth, it was just a cut. I was screaming because of my memory, and that was just a cut…

"Okay, fine!" Natalie hissed, eyes flashing angrily at my tone. She ran ahead, leaving me and Sarah behind. I stare after her, blinking stupidly.

"Natalie is hotheaded, Bri. I better make sure she cools down. The only thing that gets me is…I understand screaming when you get cut and it hurts, that makes since. But that god awful scream sounded more like fear to me." Sarah rushes ahead after Natalie, leaving me behind. I shake my head. There are moments when she shows depth and knowledge that baffles me. How could anyone hear fear? It sounds impossible, but she got it spot on. Fear is always there for me. Fear is what my 'dad' lives off of.

The halls of the Mines are dark and foreboding. I am certain I don't want to know the secrets they hold. Goblins and orcs, blood and death…so much sadness. Gandalf has to stop now and then to find his way, but he has us go fast when he does know where he was going. And as what must be hours-it seems like hours-pass, I continue to obsess over the ever approaching room. The last resting place for Gimli's cousin, the last resting place for the last defenders of Moria. And when we reach those doors I start shaking like a leaf.

"I do not recall this place…come, we shall rest for a time as I find our way!" Gandalf ushers us into the room and gives us each another mouthful of the invigorating elf drink. Then we look around and see the bodies and the stone casket in the natural light. This is so much worse than anything before…really, it is the stench. Blood and sweat, decay and mold…This must be what war smells like. I gag and a hand flies to my neck. One tear slips over onto my left cheek to leave a wet streak. So many dead. So much pain.

I don't about the others, but I can feel the pain. It pours from the walls and the bodies and most of all from the casket. It's overwhelming. Like the pain in my hand only times ten! I'm holding up better than Sarah, at least. She's sobbing, but at least she has the since to do it quietly. Natalie keeps making little choking noises in the back of her throat. I walk up and put a hand on Natalie's shoulder. She looks at me and smiles very slightly to show she appreciates my presence.

"Hold this." Gandalf thrusts his staff and hat into Pippin's hands and bends to grab the book. The big one, the one the people of Moria made in their last minutes. Gandalf began to read and I start to cry again. But unlike Sarah, who was bent over with her silent sobs, or Natalie with her loud tears, I stay firm. I keep my face impassive and I'm silent, the tears streaming down my cheeks the only sign I'm hearing Gandalf. I try to stop, but their words are so pitifully hopeless that I can't help it.

They are coming. We can hear the drums. They are coming. The words are filled with the fear of those poor victims, those poor dwarves. They were so alone, all alone. Then there is a large banging and we all turn to see Pippin standing by the well, the skeleton on its noisy course down. We all wait, holding are breaths, and relax slightly when there are no drums.

"Fool of a Took!" Gandalf says at the same time I say, "You idiot midget!" I should have reined in my temper, but then again I was never good at that. That's why I slept in the basement so much. So I take a deep breath and manage to not 'tear him a new one.' Then we all hear it-the drumbeat. Actually, it's more like a heartbeat. Like we're all in one giant heart that's throbbing, beat by beat. I shudder at the sound.

"Bar the door!" Natalie shouts at the top of her lungs. Quiet doesn't matter anymore, they already know where we are. I run towards the door at her order and Boromir follows, passing me spears to bar the door with. Bloodied spears, I realize too late. My stomach churns uncomfortably, but I resist the urge to throw up. Can't have them think I'm a sissy, they won't want to fight next to me then. I HAVE to prove that I'm strong, especially after the sob fest I just had. What was I thinking, being so emotional?

An arrow hits the door right in front of my nose and my shaky shields crack. I look down the hall and gulp. Plenty of goblins, and the cave troll is huger than I imagined! I slam the door and bar it as solidly I can, knowing it won't hold. I turn, pressing my back to the door. "They have a cave troll!"

"Come on, Sarah!" Natalie says. I look over and see that everyone is getting in position, with the hobbits in back. Sarah has one of the old swords and seems to be arguing that she wants to fight.

"Natalie's right, Sarah. You can't fight with that." I take it away from her and toss it on the ground. She starts to protest, but I pull out one of my daggers and give it to her. "Do not try to get yourself killed, understand? No cave troll."

"Yay!" Sarah smiles and runs over beside Boromir. Natalie pulls out her own dagger and goes to stand beside Pippin. I go over to the front with the other warriors, standing right beside Legolas. I refuse to be excited by that fact. This is not a good time. I draw Thunder out of the sheath and brace myself. I gasp when I look at the door. Goblin hands tearing at the door, already getting through. It looks like Legolas is strumming his bow until I see three arrows hit outside the door and hear a goblin's dying shriek.

God, I'm not ready to die yet! Not here! I think, basically panicking. Not my fault though. I'm in a closed in room with no hope of escape about to be destroyed by a bunch of bloodthirsty goblins and one giant cave troll. Possibly a Balrog, if I make it that far. But then I see that no one looks particularly confident. Everyone has a trace of fear in them, shown in their eyes or set in the lines of their faces. I'm not the only one who's scared.

Suddenly, there's a moment where everything freezes. No one is breathing and the door gives one last shudder and holds completely still before it crashes to the ground to let the enemies flood in around us. I raise my sword, ready to hack like I had with the tentacles, and was surprised as my arm snake out in a complicated movement and drive past a goblin's weapon to the chest.

The monster claws at the sword for a moment before dropping down, pulling my sword down with it. I yank my sword free just in time to bring it up to block a different goblin's attack. I bring my sword up and around to the side to cut the goblin's hip and an arrow hit it in the head. I turn and see Legolas is shooting goblins accurately and had gotten mine. He already turned away.

I am busy watching him and don't notice at first when a sword cuts into my thigh. Then the pain hits and I spin around, cleaving the head off the particularly ugly goblin. The wound isn't very deep, as far as I can tell, but there is a lot of blood. I kill another goblin with a heavy stab through the chest and one other by kicking it into someone else's sword.

"Aragorn!" Frodo yells, panic in his voice. My head snaps up and I see Frodo facing the cave troll, Aragorn nowhere to be found. I start to run through the goblins, but they seem hell bent on preventing me from reaching my goal. I cut through several and leave my sword in another, slashing my way through with my daggers. I reach the hobbit and lunge in front of him. The troll looks rather aggressive, and even bigger up close.

I can't see how I'd possibly kill it, so I throw both daggers. One buries itself hilt-deep in the troll's shoulder and the other similarly cuts into his chest. Now the thing is pissed, and it has more weapons than me. I have no brilliant plans now. The troll hits me aside with his spear-where did he get a spear that big?-and I hit something hard. My head hit it, more accurately, and I couldn't push the blackness away.

I tried to beg, to apologize, but he was angry. I had tried denial earlier, it did nothing. He had something very dangerous in his possession-a shotgun. He held it threateningly and pretended to consider my broken apologies. I knew it was worthless, that nothing would change. He was just drawing it out for his own pleasure.

"I don't believe you. Who have you brought over here?!" He demanded again. But I wouldn't give Natalie up like that. Irritated, he smashed the shotgun against my temple, knocking my out effectively. I didn't have a memory of what torture he did after that, but the end result was twenty stitches from a drug doctor and pills for a concussion.

I force my eyes open, but I think I'm not awake yet. Either that or I'm deaf, because there is no sound. I sit up and realize everyone has frozen. Frodo is lying on the ground, eyes closed, with the troll over him. A throb in my shoulder claims my attention and I see someone stabbed me at some point. I scowl at the wound. It hurts considerably more than the mark on my leg, and I can't see how deep it is.

There is a shout and everyone jumps into action. I force myself to stand up and wrench an old sword out of a nearby skeleton and run towards the troll, choosing to slash its legs. I can reach high enough to cut where the hamstrings should be, but the sword is dull and the troll's skin is thick. I just make it through the skin when I see two hobbits falling towards me. I drop the sword and my arms automatically wrap around them to break their fall. My shoulder protests viciously.

I see Aragorn and Boromir have their swords ready and Legolas is already shooting arrows. The goblins are surging around me, suddenly frantic. I hold the hobbits up a little bit, despite the ache in my shoulder. Then the troll falls over and the last goblins are dead. We have won this battle, but more will be coming.

I release Merry and Pippin and they hurry ahead to stand a few feet away from Frodo, who looks very dead right now. I walk slowly up, standing as tall as I can, trying to see him. I am satisfied that I can see the slight rise of his chest. He is alive, perhaps a bit shaken. His eyes open and he stares at us, piecing together that we are worried. He wordlessly unbuttons his shirt to reveal the shining mithril underneath.

"Mithril..." Gimli whispers, awe filling his voice. I walk forward and stretch a hand out to the hobbit. He takes it and I pull him to his feet.

"Nice to see you're alive, halfling." I say, a taunting smile on my lips. He smiles back, but it doesn't reach his eyes. Is the Ring in his thoughts once more? I think again of taking it, but that naturally brings up the thoughts of what would happen if I did. Too much evil in those thoughts.

"Brine, you're hurt." Sarah says in a worried tone. I wince, remembering my injuries. Sarah starts forward anxiously, but I turn and smile lightly.

"Yes, Sarah, I am. Not too much. We have to get out of here though. That wasn't all of them and the rest will come." I remind her. The throbbing drumbeat starts again, emphasizing my point.

"Yes, let's go." Gandalf agrees eagerly. Sarah comes over and slides my sword in the leather sheath and tenderly takes my right arm, Natalie getting my left. They helped me to run as we fled to the bridge. It was almost over...

How long we have been running, I don't know. It seems like hours before we reach that long hall. The goblins swarm down the pillars, reminding me of the Exorcist movie. We are surrounded by the goblins, laughing at us because they know we can't get away. The fire flares up down another hall, red in the black of the Mines. The enemies scream and run back up the pillars, leaving us alone.

"Run, to the bridge!" Gandalf yells orders. I obey immediately, but I can't run that fast and soon the three of us drop to the back. I examine my best friends now, afraid they might be hurt. Sarah has a shallow slice down her cheek to her chin that shouldn't scar and a few scraps and tears in her dress, but she looks fine. Natalie has a puncture wound above her knee and is limping, but looks to be okay. Nothing too bad yet...

I stumble on the stairs, broken and moving. I make Natalie and Sarah go first, and then Legolas take Pippin and lunges across expertly. Boromir and Sam make it across without incident and then Gimli gives it a go. He's off and Legolas has to catch him ("Not the beard!"). Gandalf makes a good lunge with merry close at hand. Aragorn and Frodo, and finally, as the stair is about to fall to its doom, me. I push off with as much strength as I can muster and think I'm going to make it when I notice I'm off and I start to fall.

Screams echo in my head as I fall, screams of pain and fear and anger. Screams I can't make right now because I'm trying to be strong. It suddenly hits me, the unfairness of it all. I'd never done anything wrong, really. I was in a few fights, but I never started one. So why was it me that got beat up and kicked around? Why was it me that got put in foster care, and adopted by an abusive man? Why did my parents get murdered, and why couldn't I just die?

My descent stops suddenly, and I start to go up. I think I'm flying for one insane moment before I realize someone is pulling me up. I open my eyes when two arms wrap and my waist and see Natalie pulling my left arm, Sarah pulling my right. Legolas is helping by pulling me up by the waist. My wounded shoulder aches really hard from Sarah's pulling, but I'm glad to be on solid ground.

"Brine?" Sarah whispers. I smile and stand up, ready to run. Another few hours, it must be hours, and the bridge is at our feet. Sarah and Natalie lead the way and we get to the middle...the end! We're safe! All but one...

"Gandalf!" The low murmur travels through the group and I turn to see Gandalf at the middle of the bridge, the balrog a demon from hell in front of him. The balrog is larger than I expect, head stooped so as not to crash through the ceiling. It has a fire sword. The balrog itself is the epitome of darkness. No light can escape, and flames lick up its tail to curl around its face. It has horns, big claws...the scariest thing I've ever seen, Exorcist included.

"Go back to the shadows!" Gandalf orders, raising his own sword. The balrog fights with his fire sword, but Gandalf seems to be holding. Then the sword becomes a whip that it cracks cruelly against the stone. "You shall not pass!" Gandalf says in a loud voice. He brings his sword and staff together when the demon takes a deliberate step forward. "You...shall not...PASS!" Gandalf slams his staff down and the bridge crumbles at the midway point, throwing the balrog into the dark abyss.

Gandalf stands still for a moment before turning to us warily, triumph in his eyes. I know what's next, though. A tongue of fire, the edge of a whip, comes up out of the deep ravine and grabs his ankle, pulling him to the edge. He manages to grasp the stone, to hold on. All predictable, all I knew. What isn't predictable was my reaction.

"NO!" I scream, starting forward. Sarah's arms wrap around me, restraining. My heart is squeezed tight and I feel like crying. The old man I didn't know, didn't even knew I liked...I can hear Sarah murmuring soft words under her breath, but I can't be comforted. I know what's going to happen, it doesn't lessen the grief.

"Run you fools!" Gandalf says in a carrying whisper and then he's gone, disappeared over the edge. I go numb. I don't hear Frodo's tearful scream, or even Sarah's choked sobbing noises. I turn and easily break Sarah's hold, grabbing the one thing I remember to. Pippin. I grab him because I remember somehow that he's important. And I run. I run towards the exit, my way to fresh air and out of the evil Mines. I drag the sobbing hobbit out above the earth and throw myself on the ground, him on top.

"Shh...don't cry..." I whisper consolingly to the distressed hobbits, even though my voice is lifeless. I feel dead. I should be dead. My history shows no one would care if I was dead. So many people, including myself, sobbing over Gandalf's death. If I had thought of it in time, I could have saved him. I'd be falling through endless nothing, fighting a balrog, instead. Somehow the knowledge that he's given a second chance at life does little to help.

"Here, Brine." Sarah says in a small voice, holding up my pack of medical supplies. I let Natalie take the sobbing hobbit and go to Sarah, letting her play doctor. "He comes back, you know."

"I know." I say tonelessly. Sarah is silent after that, probably wondering what brought out such a strong reaction in me. I could tell her that if I wanted to tell her every thing that had ever happened to me. How I watched a gun destroy my happy life when I was four, how I bounced around from home to home until I was seven, how I was adopted and abused by an alcoholic. How I wish I was dead.

The end of Moria finally, but the beginning of something dangerous. Life no longer matters to me. There is no reason to stay alive. The next battle might be the bliss I'm looking for.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six: Lothlorien

By

LordHelen

I look over our Fellowship-now one short-and it does nothing to lift my spirits. Tears everywhere, with only one face completely dry. Aragorn doesn't shed one tear. He looks old and withered, like he'd seen much too much of life. But he wasn't that old, and that's what got me. How much life had he seen that gave him the look of the walking dead?

"Pack up," he orders Sarah, nodding at the bandages and pain relieving herbs she's used to treat me. She silently obeys. "We need to leave."

"For pity's sake, let them rest." Boromir contradicts. I'm grateful for his objection, even if it is ignored. I'm spent completely, physically and mentally. I realize how hard it is to know the future when I look at him. I see his face-realizing how handsome he is-and know that very soon that face will be pale and cold in death. Very soon…

"By nightfall these hills will be swarming with orcs!" Aragorn yells, perhaps a bit louder than necessary. He takes Sam by the arm and pulls him to his feet. "We need to leave now."

"Where are we going to go?" Natalie asks with false curiosity. Or maybe her memory is impaired. "There's nowhere _to_ go."

"We will go to the woods of Lothlorien. Perhaps the elves will give us guidance." Aragorn answers, looking over the hobbits. I look at Legolas and see he has a pained expression on his face, not at all lessened by Aragorn's suggestion. Shouldn't he be happy that he'll be back with his own kind? Could elves get bored of mortals like us?

"Lothlorien?" Boromir frowns, his eyebrows drawn together. What were the rumors about the Lady of the Wood? I feel like I should know, but I can't remember. Maybe my memory is messed up too.

"There rumors about that place." Natalie says, not a question. A statement, like 'the weather is warm' instead of 'the weather is warm?' and she frowns too.

"Yes. Very few are good." Boromir answers her. I watch as he helps Pippin up, much to Natalie's annoyance.

"Then very few are true." Aragorn snaps. Aragorn without Gandalf is far worse than Aragorn with Gandalf. "Where is Frodo? Frodo?!"

"Hmm?" I look up and notice three red eyed hobbits standing next to each other-three, not four. I look over and see him by the stream, being miserable all alone. It must be even harder for him. Gandalf was his oldest friend, had been there for him when he was scared and had the weight of the world on his tiny shoulders, the weight of the Ring in his pocket.

"Frodo!" Aragorn calls, spotting him as well. The hobbit looks up and it looks like he's dead inside. His eyes are empty, and his face is a heartbreaking picture of sadness. He must be getting that first thought of how totally alone he is, how he has to do the quest himself. Without a fellowship.

I look at the Ring again and the whispering that has been background noise, ignored, is brought to my attention. How could a little band of gold ruin so many lives? No one would ever recover from this war. Elves had been chased out of Middle Earth and man would be scarred forever with the loss of so many battles, so many cities destroyed. Yet, with this thought in mind, I don't hate the Ring. I _want_ the Ring, and I hate Frodo for being in my way of having it.

I know this isn't true, I hate Frodo because his only purpose is to throw the Ring in a mountain and he's too useless to do even that. I don't want the Ring at all. But is all that's true, then why can't I break free of this desire? This immense need that spreads through me as I imagine the Ring. No, my Ring…

"Brine?" Sarah hisses, shaking me gently. Has she forgotten my real name already? She looks worried, and at least she snapped me out of that craze. Not _my_ Ring at all…

"What?" I ask, blinking dazedly. How long had I been staring at It now?

"I asked you a question. What do think about the rumors of Lothlorien?" Sarah repeats the question I never heard.

"They're just rumors. I'd believe Aragorn more than a couple of wild stories." I answer blankly. What was wrong with her? Since when did my opinion on elf societies matter?

"You were staring at the Ring?" Sarah asks her real question in a lower voice. I blush, and she takes that as a yes. "You can't do that! Do you want to be like Boromir?"

"I'm not like Boromir at all, Sarah! When I try to take the Ring you can scold me. Until then, leave me alone!" I whisper back. Legolas doesn't look like he's heard us…yet. Sarah looks startled and hurt by my abrupt rudeness. "Look, I'm sorry. Just…don't compare me to Boromir. Ever." I was doing plenty of that myself.

"Fine." Sarah walks to Sam, offering consoling words by the looks of it. I sighed and stood up finally. Sarah had not forgiven me when I apologized, so now I have to feel rotten with myself for making her upset.

"Brine, are you okay?" Natalie asks, looking at my bandages. Now that she brought it up, no, I'm not. My shoulder aches like hell, despite Sarah's liberal use of herbs which I suspect of being drugs because my head is easily distracted and very clouded, and my leg feels like an uncomfortable piece of wood.

"I'll be fine." I lie casually. I will never be fine. I feel like dying in the literal sense, not the 'these boots are so cute, I'm just going to DIE if I don't have them' sense, and the future holds death for others. Quite possibly Natalie and Sarah, definitely Boromir, and (I try not to think 'hopefully') me.

"Okay, I guess." Natalie stares at me with wide eyes. What did I do? Did I let my thoughts show on my face? I used to be very good at keeping control of my face. This place was destroying my hard fought for control.

"How's Sarah? I think I made her mad." I easily distracted Natalie. Her eyes narrowed in concentration and she talked.

"She thinks you hate her now. Of course, she's always very dramatic, but I think you really hurt her."

"Damn! I didn't mean to hurt her feelings! I just got irritated…" I realize how strange that is. I never get irritated with Sarah or Natalie. I'm usually very passive around them.

"Well, whatever you said upset her. Probably not too bad." Natalie consoles.

"Are we ready to go?" Aragorn asks, looking us over. No one objects this time, though I sorely want to. "Then let's move."

If I worked out regularly, maybe actually tried in P.E. when I was in school, maybe the way to Lothlorien wouldn't be as bad as it was turning out to be. But maybe not. Maybe my legs would still feel like jelly, even the injured one, and maybe the air would hiss down my throat and not reach my lungs, an maybe I'd still hate the run. Because I do. Maybe my injuries are to blame. It's a debate in my head as I run. I can't really distract myself.

It looks like we're not moving. Rocky hills seem to keep cropping up whenever one moves out of sight, river replaces river, and _nothing changes._ It all looks the same, like I'm on a treadmill, running as fast as I can but not going anywhere. It makes the run that more agonizing. When finally the woods of Lothlorien are around us it is a relief. The debate doesn't let up even when we stop running, though. I must be insane. So, with that in mind, you can see the terror when an arrow appears in front of me.

Instead of screaming and breaking down like I want to, I clench my jaw and push my scar against my leg, using the pain to hold to reality. When the terror passes into interest, I look over the attacker. Dark, lean yet muscled, a glow of youth…this elf was nowhere near as spectacular as Legolas. He puts his arrow down and smiles at me, saying something in elfish.

"No dwarf can see the way to the Lady of the Wood." Another blond elf, Haldir, says. To make Gimli feel better about it, we all have to wear blindfolds. I don't like being blind like that. It scares me to think what would happen to me at home if I put a blindfold on.

When the cloth is removed, at last, I see a breathtaking sight. Lothlorien, a city of trees. Most of it is above, beautiful tree houses with staircases made of the trees. There are a few elves on the ground with arrows and daggers, but other than the guards there is no one in sight. Haldir leads us to the tallest tree, with a grey staircase. Of course, most of the trees are grey, but this one…shimmers.

Haldir reaches the top and throws open a door that goes into the tree. Directly inside is a cavernous room with the handsome Celeborn and lovely Galadriel. Galadriel has a fountain of gold hair and is wearing a plain white dress-lace and silk. But it isn't her beauty _that makes her stunning. She glows, like the last ember of the fire or the first star of the_ night. Her pale skin has a light about it, and oh! The smell! She smells of rainbows and light and beauty. She is a wonder.

Celeborn is more plain by her side-wearing white as well, another waterfall of gold, but he doesn't glow quite so much and he smells more of trees and the forest. Not flashy things, like the reds and golds of Galadriel. He is brown and grey. "Welcome, Fellowship. We were told of your departure from Rivendell! But come, where is Gandalf? I had much wished to speak with him."

"He fell." Galadriel's voice is low, but like she is singing. "He fell into fire and shadow."

"Yes, he did. It was a balrog, in Moria." Sarah says quietly. Her hands shake gently as she remembers the last minutes of Gandalf the Grey. He was gone by now. When would he be brought back? He didn't just magic into existence in Fangorn, did he? But I was getting ahead of myself…

"Oh, this is indeed grave news! What ill luck for the Fellowship!" Celeborn says in a theatrical voice.

"Let us not dwell on things dark at this time. You are wearied, great travelers. Will you not go to rest before our queries? There is time for dark tales on the morrow." Galadriel opened her eyes and stared at each of us. "Unless there is something else?"

_I see your mind._ Her voice filled my head, blocking out her next words. _I can see the desire here. You want the Ring, but you daren't take it. Your mind is less easy…you think you are nothing, an evil that doesn't deserve breath. But I can see that you are pure…pure…_

"I wish to speak with these three before they rest. Alone." Galadriel stopped talking in my mind just in time for me to notice she meant me, Natalie, and Sarah. Celeborn graciously offered to show the rest to a bed chamber, but I saw him shoot her a confused glance.

"Lady of the Woods…a pleasure to meet you." Sarah curtsied very well, actually. She didn't follow over or anything.

"What a peculiar three you make. Two girls pretending to be men and another not born with the gift of visions but can now see what I see…and with a cloud over their pasts so not even I can see where they come from. What is their path?"

"You can't see us?" Natalie asks.

"You won't tell, will you? That we're girls, I mean." I look at her and add, "lady."

"No, I can't see you as clearly as others, young Natalie. I won't tell, Brianna. Yet it puzzles me…all three of you are mysteries. I don't often get those. Now come! Go rest, young ones. You are safe in Lothlorien!"

"Thank you so much, lady." Sarah smiles. Galadriel looked at me and nodded once. I didn't believe her, that I was pure. Unlikely. Then ?Celeborn returns, as if on cue, and leads out of the tree to another one where the whole Fellowship is sleeping on incredibly soft beds. As soon as my head hits the pillow, I'm sleeping.

No change in the days. Our clothes are taken and mended and cleaned, but that is the only thing that changes. The trees are unmoving, unyielding. It's as if time stops. I don't like it. I like to be something. Finally, it is decided we will leave Lothlorien. The last night there, I wake up. I'm unsure what woke me up, but I grab my sword and jump to my feet.

I see Frodo and Galadriel disappearing down a staircase and I follow in a daze, watching. If I attacked the fair Galadriel, I'd lose. I realize quickly that I overreacted and stow my sword in my sheath. When I reach the bottom Galadriel is pouring water into the stone basin.

"Past, present, and future. Who will gaze into the mirror?" Galadriel looks at Frodo only. Sam is here too, standing a foot behind Frodo.

"I will." I offer, and then bite my bottom lip. What is wrong with me? No one needs to relive my past, and I already know the future. But my legs walk me up to the edge of the stone basin and I lean over the edge. The water is still, calm as a glass of water. I can't see the bottom of the basin, despite the clear water. Then the water changes, as if corrupted. I can see in it fire, and I can hear screams.

"_Sarah!" Natalie's scream is filled with pain and fear. I search through the fire and find her standing with her back pressed against the lone live tree. But soon it too will burn…Natalie has burns from her legs to her neck. Smoke chokes her lungs and her long hair, just as if I'd never cut it off, is charred. "Sarah, answer-AAAHHH!" Natalie screams as the fire rushes over her, ending her life._

_Sarah screams too, louder and much shriller. It hurts my heart and I know without looking that she's dead. But I do look, chasing the nonexistent hope that she's alive, but her body is unrecognizable._

I pull back from the basin and stumble, falling down. I look at Galadriel in horror and she stares into my eyes with no emotion. "That is a future in which you die."

"No. You're wrong." I turn and jump to my feet, running past the startled hobbits and up the stairs to where we have all been sleeping in the endless nights. I fall down beside Sarah and Natalie and sigh, satisfied that they aren't dead. I go to my own bed and curl up into a ball.

_What was that?_ I wonder. _Was it just a gruesome way to say they'll die if I do? Or will Middle Earth actually burn? What does it mean?_ Then I laughed without humor. _Just when I want to die I'm given two good reasons why I can't. _

_Sarah and Natalie._

"Farewell, my good friends. May you complete your dark task without further casualties." Celeborn says.

"For each of you I have had made a cloak. It is elven made, so different from other cloaks." Galadriel motions and two elves bring us each a cloak. Then she calls us up one by one, giving us gifts. "For you, Sarah, I give this. You know the time will come to use it." Sarah's hand closes around a plain dagger.

"For you, Halfling Nate, I give this bag. Look inside when you get home." Galadriel gives Natalie the smallest bag I'd ever seen, and Natalie is clearly suspicious. "Brine…I give you this locket. It will be of aid when anger and fear take you."

"Thank you, lady." I mumble, sliding the locket over my head. It is set with an opal, and surprisingly heavy. It had nothing on the beauty of the Ring. So it is with that thought, and my focus on the Ring, that I leave Lothlorien forever.

**I would like to add another disclaimer; I am fan writing fan fiction. Most of this belongs to J.R.R. Tolkien. Also, I do not remember what the basin is called, so I went with 'mirror'. If any of you remember what it's called, please tell me.**


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven: The End of the Fellowship

By

LordHelen

"Where are you from?" I ask Legolas. The landscape is slowly passing by as we paddle down the river.

"Mirkwood," Legolas answers slowly. I'm trying to make polite conversation because I'm tired of trying to wall myself off. I want these people to like me so they can help me protect Sarah and Natalie. "I'm the prince."

"Oh…like Aragorn," I say quietly. Two boats down, Aragorn hasn't heard. He's with Sarah and Merry and Pippin, and Boromir has Natalie and Sam and Frodo. So I'm with Legolas and Gimli.

"Yes," Legolas agrees. Aragorn starts moving toward the west bank and we follow. It's relatively dry, with a nice forest for shade. But I hate it as soon as I step foot on it. Not just that I know something bad is going to happen, I can _feel_ it. I can feel something dark, and it scares me. I want to keep going, but when I turn to say this, Aragorn starts talking.

"We will camp here and tonight we will go North to Mordor."

"But-"

"We will conceal the boats and move on under cover of darkness," Aragorn continues. I throw my pack down and sit on the ground. But it's worse now, intensified. I can feel the earth shaking, and then it gets more violent. Then I realize it's just me shaking. I'm afraid now. I don't want to be, but I am.

There are a hundred thing I should fear at this moment; Boromir dying, Frodo go off on his own, what I saw in the Mirror…but none of that is registering right now. All I'm actually thinking is, _I could die today. I could die along with Boromir, and I don't want to die._

I thought I did, back before Lothlorien. I was thinking that Gandalf was a great man and didn't deserve to die. That it wasn't fair that someone useless like me gets to live while he's dead. But now, faced with the very real possibility of death, I'm terrified. Because I'm not useless, and I don't deserve to die. I don't _want _to die.

"Are you okay?" Sarah asks, coming up beside me. I'm trembling violently now and she wraps something around me-her cloak from Lothlorien. She sits next to me and rubs my arms, thinking I'm cold. I am, though. I didn't notice till now, but the wind blowing off the water is chilling me to the bone. It's not why I'm shivering, but it helps a little. "You're like ice, Brianna."

"Yeah," I agree softly. I look into her blue eyes, see her innocent face, and the rest hits me. Boromir, Frodo, the Mirror. On top of my own possibility of death. I stop trembling because this is too much. It's end of the world bad, and too much for me to handle. Whatever the dark evil thing that's coming is, the Uruk-hai or something worse, I can't feel it anymore. But I know it's there and I am scared again. I'm terrified and I want out of this nightmare. I want to go someplace warm and safe. But there's no such place for me.

"Sarah, what's wrong with her?" I notice a hand being waved in front of my face and I blink. "Brianna?"

"Nat…" I stare at her and she's worried. I look past her towards Frodo, towards the Ring. Again I feel the urge to only hold it. I know that this annoying whispering will make sense if only I can hold it. But this time the only thing holding me back is Sarah's arms.

"Brianna, what is up with you? Cut it out," Natalie complains in a whisper. I don't respond. I want the Ring, I want it now. I want to stop being afraid. I want to disappear and run away. I want the Ring to be _mine,_ and in my hand, on my finger…

"Brianna!" Sarah shakes me roughly and I stare at her stupidly. I want the Ring. I know it's wrong, I know I have to fight this need. I also know I'll lose. But maybe I can fight it long enough to let Frodo get away from me. Maybe I can fight it just long enough to get it out of reach, where I can't get it.

"I'm sorry. I spaced," I mumble.

"I'll say!" Sarah fumes, and then hugs me tight. She knows what was happening just then, I can tell. "I know you can do it."

"That makes one of us," I answer. I reach and touch Natalie and sigh. I have both of them right here. They're not dead, no one's dead. Not yet. "I think you should go to Mordor."

"What?"

"Are you okay?"

"Do you feel insane at all?"

"No, stupid," I grumble. "I mean you guys go and help Frodo."

"And you?"

"Well…Pippin and Merry might like to see me," I decide. I can't go to Mordor with Frodo, with the Ring, but I can go to Rohan. I can prove that I'm not useless.

"Let's not talk about this now," Sarah suggests. She looks kind of edgy for some reason, blushing a little and looking down.

"Where's Frodo?" Sam asks. I look up and see Frodo's gone, and Boromir's stuff is abandoned. I jump up and watch Aragorn run into the forest. Sam follows, and Legolas and Gimli stare after them. Probably deciding whether or not to follow.

"You two stay here. Don't go after Sam, don't go after Pippin," I order, turning to the forest.

"Pippin!" Natalie shrieks, realizing that all hobbits have disappeared by now.

"Stay!" I shout again as I run into the forest. I don't know which way to go, I just know I need to keep running. I can feel the evil again. The earth shakes in fear, and I get the image of iron shod feet pounding the floor. The Uruk-hai are almost here. I reach a clearing and stop just inside the trees, gasping for breath. I'm afraid again, but there's something else. I'm eager. I want to fight. I want to kill.

"Can you protect me from yourself?" Frodo asks in a small voice. My head snaps up and I see the Ring, a band of perfect gold. The whispering intensifies, becomes louder. I can understand some of it now. It's saying my name. Not my fake name, Brine. It's calling to Brianna, and I know I can take it. I could stab Aragorn from behind and kill the hobbit. I could take that Ring right now, and it's yelling at me, at Brianna…

I don't move and I smile. It's calling to Brianna, but that's not who I am anymore. Brianna was a small, insignificant girl who couldn't stand up for herself. She was a wimp, a nothing. But I'm not her. I'm tall and important. I've been to the grand city of Rivendell and taken jewelry from the hand of Lady Galadriel herself. I can beat back my foes, and no piece of gold can make me betray these people. These people are my friends.

"I would have gone with you to the end," Aragorn says, closing Frodo's hand. I stumble out and stare at Frodo.

"As would I," I murmur, so low I don't think he heard. "You're going a hard way. You can do it." I never thought much of Frodo, but in this moment I feel for him. He gave up everything to be here right now, and he'll give up even more. He really does try to be good. I can't think anything bad about someone who falls victim to the Ring. I haven't even touched it and I consider killing someone for it.

"Orcs," Aragorn muttered. I stared at his sword and saw it was glowing blue. Brightly. They were upon us.

"Uruk-hai," I realize suddenly. I forgot about the present danger in my moment of self-awareness, and now there was no time to prepare. This was it. Will I die? How much will it hurt? "Run, Frodo, run!"

I draw my sword and follow Aragorn. This wasn't a host of orcs, it wasn't a patrol. It was an army. There were so many, all wearing the White Hand of Isengard. I can't feel much right now-the adrenaline is blocking out everything else. I should be afraid and I should be running away. But I'm not, I'm walking forward like Jesus Christ and then I whip my sword up and around and an orc head falls to the ground.

Everything seems different, cut off. My arm moves on its own, blocking and slicing and killing. My mind is frozen and I can't really think. Then, while I'm brutally slaying an orc, and I remember someone. Boromir is out there, fighting for two hobbits' lives. I turn and start running back into the forest. My sword is stretched out in front of me, wild and dangerous, clearing a path for me. I know that there was no helping him, but I have to try.

I've heard people say that his death was a way to win back his honor, but that's stupidity in my opinion. He could earn his honor back in thousands of ways, but dying is out of the question. I don't particularly like Boromir, even with my new found pity for him. I just don't want to see a good man die. I hear the horn one second before I see him-see them.

Boromir is fighting off the orcs that are starting to swarm after the horn was blown. Behind him is Pippin and Merry and…Natalie. My eyes pop and I run down beside him. I cut down an orc that's near him and I glare at Natalie. "Run away! Go! Now!"

They don't move an inch. I turn and I see an orc raising his bow, ready to shoot Boromir. I'm afraid now. The adrenaline is gone, and I'm afraid of dying and of Natalie dying. I'm also angry, angry at Boromir for blowing the horn and angry at Natalie for coming here, putting herself in this situation. And something wonderful happens.

_It will be of aid when anger and fear take you._

The locket around my neck raises up, glowing bright gold. Suddenly, a golden light in the shape of a dome breaks off from it and surrounds my sword. The blade turns gold and starts to…starts to _hum._ I almost drop it in shock, but my fingers don't react. I turn to look at Natalie, who still hasn't moved, and she looks afraid.

I turn to the orcs who are still ready to kill and I raise my sword to fight. They rise to the challenge eagerly, but my sword cuts through them like a knife through paper. They can't come near me, and it's exhilarating. My fear starts to wane as I realize they can't touch me. They can't come near me, I'm dominating them. It feels great. It feels like I have control over everything.

The hum lessens in my sword and the gold dulls. Suddenly, it stops. I'm just me again. No real control, just one girl facing an army of orcs. I can't get myself to be afraid again. The high of being able to massacre orcs hasn't faded. I cut another orc's head off, but it doesn't go as easily. I hear something like a whistle and then there's a terrible pain in my shoulder. I reach over and feel something long and wooden, like a stake.

My hand comes away red, and when I look down I see an arrow. An arrow with a flower of red blossoming beneath it. I don't understand fully, and then my knees buckle and I'm on the ground. "Brianna! BRIANNA!"

"Run…Run!" I turn and see Natalie, screaming her head off. They're not moving, not any of them. Boromir is staring at me with wide eyes, and the hobbits look petrified. No one is talking except the slightly psycho Natalie. I see an arrow going through the air in slow motion towards Boromir. I lunge instinctively and stretch out my right hand. The arrow goes halfway through and then stops. I fall down and moan in pain.

The orcs are surging past us, and one hits Boromir on the head. He falls down and looks dead, but I don't know. I don't have the energy to check, either. I'm flat on my back, arms sprawled out and half dead. I'm leaking blood, and I _hurt._

"BRIANNA!" Natalie screams, and I look up. She's up way too high, and I realize the orcs have mistaken her for a hobbit.

"Not her!" I scream, struggling to sit upright. The effort makes my head spin and I fall back. "She's not a Halfling! Not her!"

An orc purposefully stomps on my right arm. It makes an odd _crunch! _Sound and pain shoots up my arm. I think it's broken, and I gasp when the orc twists his foot evilly. He moves on and most of the orcs are gone. Most, not all. I hear the last orc pull back his bowstring, ready to end a life. I don't know if he's pointing at Boromir or me, but I also don't care.

One thing is going through my head. Well, two, really; the intense pain, and Natalie. Natalie is gone. Natalie has been taken. I wanted to protect her, and I have failed. She's on her way to Isengard. She'll be tortured and killed. My Natalie is captured. She's terrified and she's going to be hurt. It hurts me imagining that, and it's all because of me. I had to save Boromir, and now one of the two most important people is gone.

I hear Aragorn's arrival, but I don't care. I think I'm about to die, which means I've failed Sarah as well. I'm a complete failure. My friends will pay for it. I feel someone touch my shoulder and I look over. Legolas is there, trying to stop the bleeding. He breaks the arrow and starts trying to pull it out. I thought I had reached the absolute limit of pain, but this is so much worse.

"Sorry," Legolas mutters as I start to scream. I want to ask where Sarah is, if she's safe, but I can't. Then it clicks into place. Her edginess, how eager she appeared to be to stay put by the river. She went with Sam and Frodo; she had been planning to all along. The division of the Fellowship seems so much more real now. Natalie is being forced to Isengard, Sarah is on her way to Mordor, and here I lay, dying.

When I die in a minute, I will seal their fate. I close my eyes and drift away in sleep, ready for my own death. Ready, but very upset.


	8. Chapter 1: TT

Chapter Eight: Pyre

By

LordHelen

My breath is gasping through my teeth and my wounds are on fire, but at least I'm ahead of Gimli. We've just reached the grassy plains of Rohan today, and the sun is almost about to set. Once it gets dark Aragorn will let us sleep. Until then, I have to endure it.

It was pretty lucky that they saved me. I woke up and I was alive and it was time to go. Of course, the waking up part was fine. It's the part that came after that I still refuse to think of. To bandage me, they'd had to remove my shirt…and it is shockingly hard to remain blind to my true identity after that.

Boromir was alive when I woke up. He said he owed me his life, but I still don't understand what I did. I was just there; I just got my hand speared by an arrow. All I know is he's alive, and I'm happy. I can see the real him now that he's nowhere near the Ring. He's kind and brave and funny and…and he's handsome.

His face has color and his eyes come alive. His hair is brighter and he looks so healthy. Like a man just recovered from a long sickness. Boromir is alive again, and he unfortunately believes I'm the reason why.

He's too…obsessed. It might be hilarious if it was someone else, but it's me. He's obsessed with making sure I'm absolutely fine. He's like a mother. _Drink water, eat, don't run too fast. Drink water, eat, don't run too fast._ I don't want to drink too much water, I'm not hungry, and of course I'm going to run too fast, Natalie is out there!

I would say it all to his face. I haven't really backed down a lot since we got here. But the truth is, I don't really want him to stop. It's annoying, sure. But it's also kinda sweet. I mean, it makes me feel wanted. Unlike the others.

Gimli doesn't really talk much to me. I think he's still getting used to the idea of me being a girl. Legolas is just the same, which is awful. Now he knows I'm a girl, which is a big help for my crush, but it doesn't really help. He's still the same towards me, which immediately gets me thinking _what's wrong with me?_

Aragorn is the most confusing. I think he might be mad that I lied to him. Maybe he thinks that he can't trust anymore. Maybe he hates me. I really don't care-or so I tell myself. But for some reason he bugs me more than Legolas. He bugs me more than obsessed Boromir or Gimli, he bugs me more than Gollum.

I haven't met Gollum, but in the books the thing always creeped me out.

I think it must be because my friends are so limited right now. Since Rivendell I've had eleven or twelve people to associate with. Not that I did associate until after Lothlorien, but still. Now all I have is Boromir, Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli. For some reason I actually, truly care what they think of me.

It feels just like high school, actually. Not that I ever had any friends at high school, but still. It's relatively the same.

"We'll stop here," Aragorn says. I drop to my knees and sigh in relief. Except now all I can do is wait. Did I mention it's been two days since we left the river? Tomorrow we will find the pyre of orcs, and maybe Natalie will be burning too. I've noticed small changes happening ever since we got here. Small or big, depending on how you look at it.

The mountain: BIG: Ring wraiths caught up to us. SMALL: They didn't catch us. Boromir: BIG: He's alive. SMALL: Well, actually, there's nothing small about that.

Anyways, there have been changes. What if Natalie dies in the fire? What if the story is altered enough to kill her? Lots of what if's, but still. It could happen, and then I'd be all alone here. Sarah off in Mordor doesn't count. _If_ she came back from there, she'd be just as devastated. It doesn't make since, but I just never thought of us apart.

I think of it now, and I hate it. How could we exist away from each other? We should always stay together. And now, apart like we are, it sucks. I miss them both so much. We belong together, a whole. We belong side by side, in the real world. We don't belong here, none of us do.

"You are not asleep.

"Christ! Don't do that!" I hiss at Aragorn without turning around. I am shocked that he's talking to me right now.

"You are not sleeping," he repeats, sitting next to me. It's the most contact we've had for two days. Maybe he's gotten over whatever it was.

"No, I am not," I agree. I stare at the yellow moon. I've never seen a yellow moon, though one time Natalie tried to convince me it was made of cheese. I didn't fall for it, which made her disappointed.

"Are you not tired?"

"I am. I'm exhausted. But I can't sleep."

"Why not?"

"I just…I _know_ something bad is going to happen tomorrow. I am worried that Natalie will get hurt tomorrow. I'm not Sarah, though. I don't know everything about the future." I make sure to add the 'everything' to keep my rant as truthful as possible.

"I am not so worried about Natalie, or Sarah, for that matter," Aragorn says. "I think they can take care of themselves. I am worried about…you, actually."

"_Me?"_ I ask incredulously. _"Why?"_

"You were just speared by two arrows only two days ago, Brianna," Aragorn answers. "You shouldn't be running so much and you have not been taking care of yourself. You are going to kill yourself."

"I haven't been too worried about myself, actually," I murmur. Is this why he's not been talking to me? He's worried about me? "I have been worried about Sarah and Natalie."

"You can do nothing for either of them if you are dead," he answers. He is probably right, but I just _can't_ worry about myself. I blame myself entirely for the miles between us. If I had been more observant with Sarah, I could have stopped her from going or gone with her. If I were a better fighter, I could have saved Natalie. I failed completely that day, and I'll never make it up until all three of us are together again.

"I suppose," I say finally. I look up at him and I can only see his outline. The light of the moon is behind him; his face is cast in shadow. "I am going to sleep right now, see?"

I lie down on my back and close my eyes, pretending to snore. Aragorn laughs quietly and I hear him walk away. But I don't sleep. I open my eyes and star at the moon, because how can I sleep? Each second tomorrow comes closer, and each second I am less certain of what will happen.

I ask myself, _what's the worst that can happen?_ I don't like that one, so I switch to, _what's the worst that I can live through?_ I don't like that any better, but I go with it. _What's the worst that I can live through?_

_Not death. I cannot live through Natalie dying._

I'll die.

_The sunrise painting the sky red. The sunrise painting the sky red. The sunrise painting the sky red._

I think this over and over again, picturing the beautiful sunrise that happened this morning. It wasn't just red, either. There was gold and pink and bright orange. Lovely colors, blending together like the most perfect colors on the whitest canvas made by the most exact strokes of the most experienced artist.

But now, when I picture the beauty, the red turns to blood and I see fire and I hear Natalie scream. My distraction has failed. I keep thinking about stumbling up to the fire and seeing the charred bodies and not knowing if Natalie is there, or if she is, which one is her.

But I'm getting ahead of myself, though. I only realize that when I feel a vibration in the ground. I look up and see horses in the distance. "Over here!"

I follow Aragorn to some rocks and throw my cloak about me. I look through the fabric and watch as the stampede approaches. They look so ferocious up close, the Riders of Rohan. Armor and weapons, the stench of sweat and blood. Fresh from a battle, weary of strangers. I happen to be a stranger, and I really wish Aragorn would let them pass. They've almost gone by, we're almost safe, and then Aragorn throws back his cloak and stands up and yells,

"Riders of Rohan!"

I stand up too, putting my hand to my sword. I wince as the wound reacts and I put my left hand on the hilt. Except I am not left handed. So I will not be able to fight very well. The Riders turn in a large arc and surround us. Then they point spears at us, at me. I don't like spears pointed at my face, they scare me. I'm scared.

"Who are you? Quickly, speak your name!" Eomer, I believe, orders. He is blond and tall. It looks like he might be handsome if he wasn't covered in grime and sweat and blood.

But I don't really focus on him because I see the spear in my face and it is really frightening. One jab and I'd be dead. Then I hear something that pulls me to the present. And such strange company you keep! Tell me, who is this woman dressed like a man?"

"Me?" I look down and notice that tucking the shirt in my belt makes it easier to tell I'm a girl. "I am B-Brianna." I hate that. I can't believe I stuttered! Like a little girl…

Legolas shifts so he's halfway blocking me from Eomer's view. That makes me warm all over for some reason. Like I'm burning, but it doesn't hurt. Suddenly, Aragorn pulls back his cloak and lifts his sword.

"I am Aragorn, son of Arathorn and heir to the throne of Gondor! This is the Blade-That-Was-Broken!"

I know Aragorn is a prince, royalty. He never seems like it, though. He always looks more like Strider. But now, and once before when we were passing the statues of kings on the river, he looks like a king. He really does. A man you would follow to battle.

"We are searching for an orc host. They have taken three of our friends. Have you seen them?"

"We slew an orc host last night," Eomer answers.

"Hobbits! Was there little people, like children?"

"We saw no children. We killed all who we found, mounded the corpses, and built a pyre."

Eomer graciously brings forward three horses that last their riders. Arod, Hasufel, and Jeny.

Boromir gets on Jeny and Legolas and Gimli take Arod. Aragorn motions for me to get on Hasufel, but I am now faced with a dilemma. I have also overlooked the part of getting on a horse, and it looks big. Aragorn laughs and helps me on, but that's worse. I must be ten feet in the air; the ground is so far away. Aragorn gets on behind me and we're off.

The fear vanishes. There can be nothing more exhilarating then racing across the country side on horseback. But my enthusiasm is cut short when I see a plume of black smoke erupting in the distance. As we get closer, I realize this is it. I will find out now what happened to Natalie.

Much to Aragorn's amusement, it takes both him and Boromir to help me off the horse. According to them, I am ridiculous. I walk up to the pyre and poke a body with my foot. It rolls over and stares at me with one glassy eye. Beats me what happened to the other eye.

I use my sword to shift through the remains, looking for a lock of hair or a brown eye. Anything that could be Natalie. Then I spear some fabric and drag it out of the dim embers. A belt with the letter _N_ scratched into it. Natalie's belt.

I know this proves nothing, but somehow this feels very final to me. So I turn and walk towards the horses, the belt still speared. "Where are you going?" Legolas is right behind me.

"This way."

"What's that?"

"Natalie's belt." I offer him the charred leather and it takes it off the end of my sword.

"Where are you going?" he repeats.

"To kill Eomer," I say as soon as I realize that's what I want to do. I want to kill him for burning Natalie.

"I can't let you do that," Legolas says after a moment, grabbing my arm. "It's not his fault."

"Let me go!" I whisper, keeping my eyes lock on his face. Trying not to remember the last time someone did this. "I promise I won't kill Eomer."

Legolas releases me and I run to Hasufel and stroke his mane gently. I am horrified with myself! How could I even think of doing that? I wanted to kill another person! I've killed, but orcs don't count. They are monsters. Eomer is a human being, and I _wanted_ to kill him. I really, truly did.

"There is a trail…" Aragorn's voice reaches me. I return and watch him follow the trail to the forest. He reaches out and pulls something off a tree branch. He has five strands of black hair in his hand.

"Natalie," I whisper. And I go into the forest.


	9. Chapter 2: TT

Chapter Nine: Aragorn

By

LordHelen

It creeps me out, walking in a forest with walking trees. I don't know which trees are Ents, so that makes me a little bit insane. Every creak makes me jump and if a leaf so much as moves an inch, I have to back away from that tree. Because what if an Ent comes and steps on me?

I walk in a green twilight, not absolutely positive what time it is. My stomach says it is time for lunch, so I am going by that clock. Gimli looks just as uncomfortable as me, one hand always on his axe. Naturally, the elf is all happy-go-lucky in the woods. I could swear Legolas is glowing with his absurd delight to be in a forest. Like a fat person and a chocolate cake.

I can't tell about Aragorn. He seems rather cool, like he doesn't care he's in an enchanted forest with giant trees that that can completely destroy him. Then again, he might be acting that way because he has to be the leader. This seems very…nice. Especially since if I saw him freak out, I might just run away screaming.

Boromir doesn't like it any more than me. In fact, I think it might be worse for him. He looks like he's feeling claustrophobic. Great, and now I'm feeling claustrophobic. The trees are too many, closing in around me. Then all the trees creak at once, like they're about to stand up and kick my butt.

"Gimli," Aragorn whispers, looking at the dwarf. He has his axe out, which explains why the trees are mad. "Lower your axe."

Gimli replaces his axe on his belt and looks around at the trees, all spooked. I'd beware, if I were him. The trees know he's an enemy now. I decide this world has too much magic. If it had less magic, the Ring wouldn't exist, trees couldn't kill you for the fun of it, and elves might not be _so_ far above the rest of us.

Then again, what fun would it be if there was no magic? No fun. The world would be completely boring. Also, if we happen to come across a good wizard with magic, he might heal my broken arm.

Yeah, my arm was broken by that sadistic orc and I'm not allowed to use it for any reason whatsoever. What really sucks is it is my right arm, and I'm right-handed. So I won't be much use in a fight…or a pop quiz, should one appear randomly.

I feel a bit better about the whole Natalie situation. She probably got picked up by the Ent and is fine right now. I'm really worried about Sarah. Sam and Frodo get through all fine, but she absolutely loathes Gollum. She won't just travel with him, I'm sure. We stop to eat finally, but again, the only thing on the menu is lembas.

"How big do you think this forest is?" I ask once we have stopped and get out the flavorless food.

"Really big," Gimli answers.

"Maybe a few acres," Boromir offers.

"Are acres big?" I wonder. They all look me and I decide to go with yes. "Do you think a few hobbits could be easily lost?"

"Extremely," Aragorn answers. I curse under m breath. I did not want to spend the rest of my day searching through the forest. Couldn't the Ent bring them to us or something? We get going again, and the green twilight starts to go a shade or two darker.

Then there's the sound of a branch breaking and We all look that way, suspicious. I see a flash of white in the green.

"The White Wizard," Aragorn murmurs. "Get ready…"

We all turn when he does, and there's a flash of light. Legolas' arrow dies and Gimli's axe is ineffective. Aragorn drop their sword like they've been burned. I don't draw my weapon-because I can't-and wait patiently for the light to fade. When it does, I really see him. Gandalf.

"GANDALF!" I fling myself at him and wrap my arms as tight around him as I can. I didn't expect to feel so happy, but about the time the tears start, I realize how much I've really missed him. He didn't seem like such a big part of my life before, but now I see that I had cared for him a lot.

"You have changed quite a lot, Brine," Gandalf commented, hugging me back. I pulled back to give him a smile. "Now, we have much to talk about. Such as…what has happened since I've been gone?"

The recount was lengthy and boring. I put in details about my locket, and was very grateful when Aragorn quickly glossed over the me-being-girl part. Then Gandalf told us about his time in purgatory, and finally we were all caught up with each other and on our way out of the forest to Rohan.

When we were beneath the shining sun, Gandalf whistled for his white horse and our ponies came with. We'd had to leave them behind when we entered the forest. Once again I rode with Aragorn and we set out across the countryside. I became rather competitive with Shadowfax, whispering encouragement and insults to Hasufel Then I get tired and fall asleep.

_The moon shines above me, lighting the ground around me. I know I'm not alone, I feel his arm across my shoulders, holding me tight against him._

"_Will you not tell me of your past?" Aragorn asks me, turning to face me._

"_No…my past is something no one should relive," I answer honestly, taken aback by his question._

"_Very well then. Let us forget pasts and futures. Let us think of only the present." Aragorn pulls me against him and his lips connect with mine. At first my body and lips are stiff with surprise. Then my body reacts, molding around his in a way I'd never imagined possible. My lips fit his as perfectly as could be, and a warmth started in my stomach, a fire._

_The fire spreads down, feeding me on as I kiss back with fierce intensity. His hand movedsto the small of my back, going down slowly…_

I jerk awake, sweating and cold at the same time. After the dream, I feel very uncomfortable in the same saddle with Aragorn. It is dark, not the moonlit night of my fantasy. After what seems like an eternity, Gandalf lets us stop. I crawl away from the others and wrap myself in my cloak.

I feel all hyper about the dream. Then a realization crushes me into a depression as I take into consideration my first crush. Recently I have been feeling optimistic about something between Legolas and I. He knows I'm a girl, a first step in the right direction. He also feels protective of me, which is very good.

But I suddenly want Aragorn more, and he doesn't even think of me that way. Which would make Legolas my second choice, which isn't fair to him. He should be with someone who'd pick him over anyone else. Which isn't me. So that paints a pretty picture for them, with me left alone in the rain. Which is where my despair emanates from.

And I don't sleep that night.


	10. Chapter 3 TT

Chapter Ten: Rohan

By

LordHelen

I really wish I'd slept last night. Gandalf got us up really early to start again, and my arm aches because I let Gandalf heal it before we started. His power sped up the process and he promises it will be fixed by the time we reach Rohan, but there's some kind of ache in my bones. I've decided to call it a healing ache.

Also, I'm with Aragorn again because I just couldn't bear to hurt his feelings by blowing him off and going with Boromir. My eyelids droop because it's been almost twenty four hours since I last slept, but I can't fall asleep on Aragorn again. Funny how one dream can change my whole perspective…

When we reach Rohan finally, it's been three days of almost constant riding. Last night I slept particularly well and I have no problem staying awake. When we reach the gates of Rohan, some man stops us. Aragorn tells him about Eomer and he lets us through, but I wish he hadn't.

The people of Rohan are sad. Few are in the streets, and those that are hurry about in their haste to get inside. The younger ones stare at us with sad eyes, like they are dead inside. Or dying. Wormtongue has done his work well. The king is doing very poorly, and the people know it.

When we get to the king's hall, another man stops us and asks for our weapons. Aragorn makes a fuss about his precious sword.

"Aragorn, just put it down and move on. What are they going to do, break it?" I hiss. His eyes go wide as he thinks of that possibility and I roll my eyes. Then again, who am I to judge? I have trouble parting with my sword, and it isn't the Sword that was Broken or whatever.

I put down my daggers and sword and fight to keep straight face as Gandalf takes Legolas' arm and pretends to be old and crippled. Legolas has the funniest look on his face! I follow them in and wrinkle my nose at the smell. King Theoden is a sight, but not in the good way. His clothes are old and grayed, his face lined beyond his years.

Plus, the smell coming off him is…strong, to say the least. Wormtongue is by his side, already whispering lies in his ear. I can even hear a bit.

"…comes Gandalf the Grey and his band of misfits. We shouldn't take leniency with him this time-just look at his company! He brings a woman dressed as a man into your halls!"

Before, when Eomer mentioned it, I blushed and stammered, embarrassed to be singled out. Now it feels different, like I need to kill Wormtongue and take a really long shower. Only one is possible, so I'll have to see to his death. I look down at my clothes and realize with the start the white is covered with blood. This now seems stupid, because of course there'd be blood. I was stabbed with arrows!

"Theoden King," Gandalf begins, bowing his head slightly.

"Gandalf the Grey, come back in shame." Theoden chuckles mirthlessly. "Perhaps you have come to return my prized steed? Or to bow down and admit defeat?"

Sounds like he's looney-toons to me, but then again, who wouldn't be? Gandalf raises his head slowly, which sets Wormtongue off muttering again. He talks so fast there's no way Theoden can understand.

"Since when does the king of Rohan stoop so low to depend on lies and trickery? Or are you so far gone you believe the words of Wormtongue?"

"How dare you come to my king in his troubled state," Wormtongue hisses, standing up. "And accuse him of lies?"

"I accuse you, not Theoden King." Gandalf glares at Wormtongue. The slimy man sits back down and starts hissing into Theoden's ear again. "Keep your forked tongue between your teeth! Or can the king not speak for himself?" Gandalf snaps. His face turns softer as he looks at Theoden. "I'm here to help you."

"Help me? You have no power her, Gandalf the _Grey_." Theoden is surprisingly aggravating. I guess it's just Wormtongue, but that was especially nasty. Gandalf pulls back his grey robes to reveal his shining white ones.

"His staff! Take his staff!" Wormtongue shrieks. Then a bunch of guards fill the hall, ready to attack. And we have no weapons. "Stop them!"

The guards hesitate when they come to me, not sure what honor dictates about attacking a girl. I use that to punch them. Sometimes I kick them in the leg so I can punch them easier. About the time I knock a few to the side they stop hesitating, which means I have to be fast.

I see Wormtongue trying to get away in the chaos, so I jump in the air and kick on man in the chest, wincing as his head cracks against the stone. I springboard off his chest and land next to Wormtongue, punching him in the head. He falls down, knocked out, the little wimp. I turn and see Aragorn holding Eowyn.

It's a restraining hold, his arms wrapped around her torso as he leans toward her father. Still, the close contact, the intimacy of high emotions, does something to me. I think about strangling her as jealousy roars in my chest. Jealousy that he's holding her. Jealousy of her position, and jealousy that she doesn't have a crush on him yet. How easy it would be if I didn't have a crush on him.

Then he lets her go and she runs away from him, allowing the angry monster in my chest to lie down and purr. For now. I walk over to the man I kicked and test his head. He's bleeding, but looks okay. He's not unconscious, at least. I look up and she the real Theoden.

His face is younger, more alive. His eyes spark with inner fire as he gazes at the sword in his hand, turning this way and that. Then he spots Wormtongue, creeping towards the door.

You slithering snake!" Theoden yells, throwing Wormtongue out into the street. The people come out to watch, as do I. I really hope he slices the bastard up. "You will pay for what you have done to me!"

"Theoden!' Aragorn puts a hand on the king's shoulder, halting his angry tirade as he raises his sword. "He is not worth it. Let him return to his master. He will be punished enough there."

I roll my eyes_. Yeah, let's let Hitler go while we're at it_, I think sarcastically. It would be so much more fun to kill Wormtongue because he's as bad as an orc. He's been found guilty by pretty much the whole of Rohan, including us, so why not kill him? String him up by his neck; chop him into bite sized bits. Why let him go? Do we want Saruman to know Rohan is free?

That night, we're all held in places of honor at the feast. We're supposed to toast at the end of the king's speech, and I'm thinking water. What goes down my throat is definitely not water and I choke for a moment.

"Is this the first time you've tasted beer?" Aragorn asks from my right, smiling real big. I narrow my eyes and nod. He laughs, and I don't know why. I drink more, draining the mug. Then I drink more. And more. And more. And more.

I groan as I open my eyes, shutting them quickly again. My head is pounding and the bright light spikes the pain. I hear someone laugh quietly nearby.

"Who's there? Is it you, death?" I ask groggily.

"No, it is I," Legolas answers brightly. His sunshine mood hurts me and I pull a pillow over my head.

"Stop being happy," I order him. Then I realize what's happening and why Aragorn laughed last night. I have a very bad hangover. "What happened last night?"

"You drank quite a lot. I believe you got mad at a cat for calling you a loser, but Gimli might have exaggerated that part," Legolas offers. I groan again and sit up. I am in a really soft bed and Legolas is at my side, sitting in a chair.

"My head hurts," I complain. Suddenly I soaking wet, drawing pain from my head to my ice cold skin.

"Does that help?" Gimli asks cheerily. I glare at him. I inspect my room carefully, looking for any other annoying people. They leave me to get dressed and I find a copper tub of hot water. I peel off my grimy clothes and scrub my skin until it starts going red and the water turns cool. I dry myself with a fluffy white towel and, the towel wrapped firmly around my body, I go to see if I have any other clothes. The wardrobe has several of the royal Rohan guard uniforms, which means I'm going off to battle soon, and a few dresses. I try those on first.

The first is a pale baby pink, floor length with a little tail trailing behind me. I wrap my hair on top of my head with one hand and look at myself in the mirror. I look…wonderful. I look better than Sarah used to in her miniskirts. The dress fits my body perfectly, parted at the hip on the right side to expose my pale leg.

The next is a strapless deep sea blue dress that is straight down, a fancy dress that I'd never imagine wearing. It slips on and off easily, a suspicious convenience.

The final dress is yellow as the sun, too bright to look at. I put on a simple white tunic and dark black pants, putting the dresses back. It was a fun fashion show, and I could just imagine myself being the girl that wears outrageously lovely dresses because she can while I did it. But in the end I'd always put on the shirt and pants and go fight with the guys, because I couldn't really use dresses where I'm going.

I get down to the mess hall and get a bowl of mush and bread, a bit more flavorful then lembas, Then I get tons of fruit because it all has taste. The king and Aragorn and Gandalf are talking about moving the people of Rohan to Helm's Deep.

"If you were to go to Helm's Deep, you'd be trapped!' Aragorn pointed out.

"Helm's Deep has not once fallen," Theoden replied smugly.

"There's a first time for anything," I muttered.

"What?"

"Well, just because Helm's Deep hasn't fallen yet doesn't mean it never will. I mean, I wouldn't want to be the one stuck in Helm's Deep when it does fall."

"Helm's Deep won't be penetrated. The defenses are the best imaginable."

"Until the day it's penetrated," I pointed out. Theoden does not look very appreciative of my opinion, so I go for a walk after breakfast. Everyone in Rohan is outside, bright and happy. Children are running in the streets, some playing a medieval version of soccer. One little girl kicks the ball really hard and smiles, dimples popping out.

She has jet black hair-just like mine. I reach up to touch my hair. It has grown since I last cut it, just past my shoulders now. I know the blue streak is still in it, a streak I died so many years ago. I wanted to take a stand, pretend I was my own person when I was thirteen. I got hair dye at the store and made it blue. My father didn't even notice, though.

I watch the kids run around with their mothers watching on, eyes all lovey-dovey. I wonder briefly what it would be like to stand in their place, watch as my own child runs around with a ball. Then I realize how terrified I would be. How could I bring a child into a world where he-she could be harmed so easily? My life is proof of that.

I return to my room and sit on my bed, rubbing head. The hangover has mostly gone, but my head throbs continuously. The sun's position in the sky says it is almost noon by the time my headache lets up. I wonder when we're going to Helm's Deep. Then when I go out to eat lunch I see we're already getting ready.

"Lady Brianna," Eowyn says, coming up to me with the reins to a really big horse in her hands. "I have come to give you Gladsan, your steed."

"M…mine?" I squeak, looking at the monster. He must be at least a foot taller than Hasufel. Eowyn laughs and walks off, probably to get ready. I put one hand on Gladsan's back, one foot in the stirrup. I heft myself up and swing over, landing on his back.

I take the reins and sit still, looking around with wide eyes. I'm on a horse…now how do I move? I try doing that cool whipping thing with the reins they do on TV, the one where they 'tk-tk' and the horse starts going, but Gladsan just stands there. So I'm at a loss.

"Something wrong?" Boromir asks, moving his horse over through the crowd. I watch how he does it, but he's just sitting there as the horse moves.

"I don't know how to move…" I check to make sure I'm on right and try the TV thing one more time. He laughs at me, which burns, because Boromir is one of the worst horseman I've seen yet. He is awkward and clumsy on a horse.

"No, here. Like this," he shows me how he gently presses his legs against the horse's sides and hit his feet in fast. The horse starts walking. I try it, but it takes a few tries before I get enough force. Gladsan starts walking, picking his way through the crowd until we get outside. I use the reins to pull him anyway I want and then I get him to stop by pulling the reins back.

After I get past the whole sitting-on-another-bigger-animal thing, it's kind of…fun. I parade my horse around the open grass, earning laughs from my friends and are-you-insane?-stares from strangers. Then it's time for us to start going. I get irritated real quick when Eowyn starts to openly flirt with Aragorn.

And even more so when he flirts with her. Maybe he's just being a friend, or trying to be funny, but it looks a lot like flirting. Then, to my relief, two scouts come running up and break apart the two. Then again, seeing as how they're yelling about orcs, maybe it's not a relief.

I ride up with Aragorn, looking at the monstrous orcs. They're riding their close and personal minions-wargs. I draw my blade and charge down as a part of Theoden's army. I come to a really big and fat orc and chop his head off in one strike and stab down to kill the warg.

It is the rush of battle, the thrill of the kill. I cut and chop eagerly, ending lives that never should have begun. It might seem a little sociopathic to be thinking that, but it is true. Orcs should never have existed. Orcs are a mockery of elves, twisted and tortured beyond any real compassion or beauty. They're ugly with blackish blue skin and black eyes, and sharp pointy teeth like a vampire's fangs.

So I have no problem chopping off any orc head, since they aren't truly living. To really, truly live, you have to feel something besides hate and fear. Which they don't. Of course, if I were to meet a human in battle, I might feel different. Humans, however despicable and dirty and purely _evil _a person is, they're still a person.

I notice Gimli crushed under an orc and a really big warg. A smaller warg comes over on top, ready to kill. I ride over and stab once through the back, effectively stabbing it through the heart-or at least somewhere near-and it falls down on top of Gimli like the other two.

"Help me up?" Gimli asks, pushing futilely at his pile. I grab the last warg's foot and guide Gladsan to the side, pulling the warg off. Gimli manages to shove his pile higher and higher and, deeming he'll be just fine on his own, I ride back towards the battle that had raged on all around us. I look up over the swarm of battle towards the cliff where the ground suddenly stops. No decline like a hill; straight down.

I see Aragorn being dragged off the cliff. Some books say that the end is in slow motion where you can see every pain staking detail in perfect clarity as the bad thing happens inch by inch. To hell with that, one moment he's on the ground and the next he's over the cliff and the next he's not in sight.

I try to make my way over there but the orcs swarm up in front of me as if to specifically block me from reaching the cliff. I cut them down with a new aggression, a new edge. I need to get to the cliff, I need to save Aragorn.

Then it registers that there's no saving him now. He's down in the river, drowning as the frothy waters carry his body farther and farther away. The warg dragging him down towards the bottom of the icy stream. The thought of his death makes me sad and I'm distracted by the despair. An orc slashes open my thigh, but I can't feel the pain yet. I cut the orc up and remember to guard myself, but I can't really feel the pain.

Then some more of Theoden's warriors come up and help us kill the orcs. The battle is a blur as I strike down orc after orc. Men go around killing the wounded orcs and counting the dead. I see Legolas and Gimli wander towards the cliff and I follow them at a slow pace. Gladsan tries to support my now terribly aching leg in a way where it won't be unnecessarily jostled.

"You are lying!" Legolas hisses at the orc on the ground. I assume the orc just said Aragorn fell off the cliff.

"No, he's not," I say as I come up. Neither of them look back at me, because Legolas bends forward and takes the silver necklace from the orc's hand. "I saw Aragorn fall."

I pull my leg up towards me slowly and take a white shirt out of my pack shredding it with my dagger and tying it around my leg. It would have to do as a bandage for now. Legolas notices my jerky movements as I do so, probably because I'm trying not to cry so I do it aggressively.

"You are hurt," he says. It's not a question.

"Damn orc got my leg," I mutter, stopping for a moment before I continue, a little less emotionally. "What about you? I didn't see you much." At all, really.

"Not a scratch," Legolas says maybe a little too smugly. Stupid elf, perfect at fighting and every other damn thing on the planet earth. I knotted the shirt, already soaked red with blood, and turn to look at Theoden who moved very purposefully towards the center of the battlefield.

"There will be another orc host coming. Eowyn has taken the women and children to Helm's Deep. We will follow to protect them there, for we cannot engage in another battle with the orcs. Let us leave!" Theoden turns his horse and charges off towards (I assume) Helm's Deep.

Gladsan follows without any urging and Gimli and Legolas quickly get on Arod and follow. We ride for awhile. Long enough for me to get a real bandage from one of the men and start to wish Gandalf were here to replace this agonizing pain with the healing ache. Long enough for me to wallow in complete sorrow over Aragorn's death. Long enough for me to consider Legolas.

This, by the way, is not to say I don't still feel incredibly sad about Aragorn and I've completely moved past him. But for some reason Legolas pops up in my thoughts, bringing irrational joy to an otherwise bleak mind. I think of his long, muted gold hair and sparking blue eyes.

And as I think of this, The gate of Helm's Deep changes from horizon to closer to me riding through it.


End file.
